


Perspective

by Bow_woahh



Series: Tumblr Prompts [4]
Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Alternative Universe - Modern, F/F, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Human Catra (She-Ra), Mutual Pining, Prison AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-11 23:55:06
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 25,805
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20554793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bow_woahh/pseuds/Bow_woahh
Summary: "Like you caved in Adora, you took the dive, and was it worth it?"Adora looked at Catra, biting the inside of her cheek."I guess not."Although, Adora couldn't deny that she felt almost lucky to have met someone like Catra, even if it was in here.ORTwelve months. Adora had earned herself twelve months in Prison — it was virtually hell on earth. Or it least it should have been, if not for a certain someone.





	Perspective

**Author's Note:**

> Some things you may not know/I want you to know:
> 
> \- Hooch is prison made alcohol that inmates drink if you didn’t know (which most wouldn’t I think)
> 
> \- A C.O stands for correctional officer (basically just a guard)
> 
> \- No, this isn’t an orange is the new black au, but since I did start watching it mid writing, it’s slightly...inspired?
> 
> Anyway enjoy, and maybe grab a snack, or drink, or whole meal!

#####  **-1-**

Walls. Adora felt as if she was constantly looking at walls. They weren't nice walls either. They were just grey. Really fucking grey. And a little cracked. The cell was stuffy too. The _ whole facility _ was stuffy. She had barely been there a day and had already felt violated, dehumanised and made to feel worthless, nothing more than a pretty face to some, nothing more than a number to others.

She spent the first month laying low, staying away from the girls she was advised to stay away from, working hard, and making a couple friends — though she knew they were more allies than friends, or at least that's what they were to her. 

Everything moved slowly, the air _ tasted _bad, almost as bad as the prison slop served, and some nights, once her bunk mate had dozed off, she couldn’t help but cry. They were tears of regret, tears of frustration, tears of loneliness. 

One night, her bunkmate must have heard her, and woken up, or had never been asleep to begin with, because one moment she was focusing on her breathing, then the next, she saw feet hitting the ground. She crouched down by Adora’s bed, and in the dark, whispered, “wanna do something to...take your mind off it?” The tone in her voice made it clear what she meant. Adora felt sick. 

“Um...nah, I’m okay,” she replied, yawning and rubbing her eyes, feigning exhaustion. Adora couldn’t tell whether she was annoyed or not, it was too dark to read her expression, but she climbed up to her bed in silence and left it at that. 

Eventually, Adora got to sleep, but not even the deepest sleep would bring peace to her mind, or let her forget how much she hated this place.

Was taking the blame for all those drugs worth it? 

Nope. Definitely not, is what she had realised. 

_ One month down, eleven more months to go. _

#####  **-2-**

Two months in and she got a new cell mate. Adora wasn't bothered, she didn't exactly get to know the last girl. They hadn’t talked much, especially after _ that _ night. Both just went about their own business, not getting involved with each other's. 

The new girl was called Catra.

She got put in for third degree robbery. 

"See, I didn't want to do it, but growing up around that environment, and feeling like you have no other way to make money, you cave in. You get that, right?"

Adora nodded. 

A week ago they had barely said a word to each other. Catra was quite hostile, and Adora wasn't looking to cause trouble. Yet now, the pair couldn't stop talking.

"Like you caved in Adora, you took the dive, and was it worth it?"

Adora looked at Catra, biting the inside of her cheek. 

"I guess not." 

Although, Adora couldn't deny that she felt almost lucky to have met someone like Catra, even if it was in here. 

She was talkative, attentive, confident, intelligent. Even though she seemed unapproachable with no interest in making a connection with others, that was completely untrue. Catra _ was _ tough, but on the inside she was still a little girl who didn't get the love she deserved as a kid. Even now.

They would spend hours up at night talking about things like books, people, places — and everything in between. 

"I think that the monster was just misunderstood, and that he would have never thirsted for revenge if Victor didn't play him, lie to him."

"You think so?" Adora asked, eyes looking up at nothing as the dark of the night enveloped them both. 

"Yeah, I mean, he just wanted love, a family, why shouldn't he have that? Everyone should."

"So should you." Adora knew from the little Catra had told her that she was an orphan. Like her.

Catra laughed. "Goodnight Adora," she said from the top bunk. 

"Goodnight Catra."

With Catra around, things were starting to feel close to bearable.

_ Two months down, ten more months to go. _

#####  **-3-**

Three months in and the two had fallen into a routine:

On weekdays: they would wake up; run on the track together; get a shower; get breakfast together; then work; after a small break; next lunch; more work; then dinner. Afterwards, the two would wander or go outside to get anything they needed at the commissary, or just for some fresh air. They'd go hang out in their cells for a while, then it would be lights out. 

On weekends, their schedule wasn't half as ridgid, since they didn't have to work on weekends. They would still try to wake up at a decent time, run, shower and be productive by going to the library and reading, (if it were Catra's choice) or working out some more (if it were Adora's).

It made Adora feel more at home, in a strange way, having a structure where it wasn't just her who had to follow it. She wasn't one to do things alone. So Catra's company was very much appreciated, and Adora liked to think hers was too. 

They had other friends (or could you call them that?) that they would talk to at times. Adora hadn't really talked to them much before anyway, so it was even more infrequent once Catra came along. 

Sometimes, Adora would see Catra talk to people briefly, not usually for long, but for some reason she always felt this_ pang_. A pang of... jealousy? There wasn't much for her to be jealous of, Catra never exactly looked like she was having a good time talking to them at the glances Adora would catch every so often. 

Maybe, that meant there was something to be worried about.

_ Three months down, nine more months to go. _

#####  **-4-**

Four months in, and one of her _ pals_, Coco, sat next to Adora one day in the lunch hall. She sat where Catra normally would, though today she had felt really ill so she was given the day off to rest, and not contaminate everyone else. It threw Adora off, not having Catra there to stick to _ their _ schedule. 

"Hey Coco…" Adora was rightfully confused as to what she was doing here. No one usually sat near her when she was with Catra, other than Entrapta and Mermista.

"Yo, Adora, you better watch your back girl," Coco lowered her voice. And when someone lowered their voice to speak there, it was usually something serious. 

Adora shifted in her seat, "you better start telling me what you're talking about."

Coco got uncomfortably close, breath on Adora's ear as she said, "Catra."

Adora turned to give her an incredulous look. "Bullshit."

"Nu-uh."

"Okay, let's say I believe you, what about her?"

Coco scoffed, "You don't know where she's really from, do ya? Who she's really mixed in with?" 

"Obviously not the specifics, but I know enough," Adora shot her a glare. 

"I _ promise_, you don't."

Of course she knew enough about Catra. Who's _ Coco _ to say otherwise?

"What don't I know Coco? I know she grew up in a bad area, I know she doesn't want to be here, to have done the things she did. Like a lot of people here. What else do I need to know?" Adora was finding this more and more frustrating.

"Lower your voice _ smart-ass_, ya don't want people hearing ya’ business," Coco hissed, clearing her throat to continue.

"Okay, well for starters, she's the _ daughter _ of one of the biggest gang leaders in a city nicknamed the Fright Zone, it's just out of state. Hordak is practically the king of that place. No one can cross him. He's got lots of people on the inside and she's obviously been pretty incognito until now, but I've got sources telling me that she got arrested on _ purpose _ to do her father's dirty work on the inside, all the drug business an' stuff.

"And also, apparently she's needs an...assistant perhaps, a side piece. Someone who trusts her, is gullible. It’s obviously you who's she's tryna rope in, who she can blame if anything bad were to happen, or if they get caught.”

Adora was slack jawed. 

Coco sat up a little. "So...yo’ being played dumbass."

Was she being played? Were all those late nights talking, laughing, and sharing things about themselves all fake? 

Leaving her food uneaten, Adora got up and stormed off to her cell. 

Catra was still in the nurse’s care, so the room felt barren and empty without her. At the same time, she was also glad that Catra wasn’t there, she was glad Catra didn’t have to see her hit the cracked, cold, grey walls over and over, and she was glad she wasn’t there to see the stream of tears coming down her face.

She looked at the calendar pinned up. _ Tuesday 21st July. _

_ Four months down, eight more months to go. _

#####  **-5-**

Five months in, and Adora hadn’t seen Catra in nearly a week, when she was supposed to have been back days ago. It was strange not having her around, she wanted to miss her, but after what Coco said, why would Adora miss a liar? 

Adora was just going day by day, waiting for Catra to come back, and then they would talk. 

They would really, _really_ _talk._

One thing Adora didn’t like about Catra not being here was the vulnerability she felt. Before, no one would dare shoot her a look while Catra was by her side (or while Adora was by hers) and now, she was getting all sorts of looks, glares, _ growls_, for no apparent reason. And unlike most of the girls here, Adora _ had _ a pretty clean record before all of this. She had never meant to get involved in that kind of life. The kind of life that landed you in prison. Adora had definitely not envisioned herself in this position. It upset her more than she let on to most, to Catra specifically.

Adora had let things get out of hand. 

She wasn’t about to do the same thing here. However, she was scared _ she would _ if all these gremlins didn’t stop looking at her like she was carrying the bubonic plague. Adora didn’t like to solve things with mindless violence, but it was all some of these women knew how to do, and if she had to as well, she would.

***

It was a Saturday when Catra finally returned to their cell.

Adora had come back from her shower, white robe wrapped around her when she heard a familiar voice saying, "So I take two every couple hours, but no more than eight, including the night pills?” 

She wished she could just walk right back into the shower and drown herself, but that wasn’t going to happen, and it was definitely too late now because—

“Adora! Dude, I honestly missed your annoying face and shit!” Catra went in for a hug and Adora begrudgingly accepted it. 

And_ of course _ Catra instantly noticed something was up. “Yo, is there something wrong?” 

Was she really acting like she cared, right now? 

Adora shook her head, biting the inside of her lip. “Nothing, I...um just need to get changed.”

“Yeah, and I can help with that,” Catra stuck out her tongue, which would normally leave Adora amused, however, Coco's words echoed in her head. 

_ You're being played dumbass. _

It was all just apart of some big scheme. She was just another part of it. 

Adora sighed, words quiet but sharp, "Just stop Catra." 

Taking the hint, Catra's grin morphed into a frown, and she walked off, muttering to herself. 

If Catra hadn't thought there was something seriously wrong before, she definitely did now, for better or for worse.

Once Adora was changed, Catra returned to their cell, sitting beside Adora on the bed.

Adora tried to find the energy to shuffle away, but instead mumbled a feeble "no," struggling to do much else. 

"Adora, what's up with you?"

Catra was met with silence. She shuffled closer. "Seriously, did something happen while I was gone?"

Adora rolled her eyes, and Catra's brow furrowed. 

Scoffing, Adora's voice rose as she spoke, _ "Did something happen, Catra? _Are you really going to act like I don't know? Are you really going to continue lying to me?"

Catra reached for Adora's shoulder, "Adora, I—" 

Slapping her hand away, Adora got up. 

"No, Catra, _ fuck off." _

Catra stood up, wearily standing at arms length. "I...I don't understand, Adora can— can we just talk?"

Adora took a step forward, then another step, until her face was just inches away from Catra’s.

"Okay, I'll talk. Tell me the truth, are you working for Hordak? That gang leader? Are you his _ daughter?_ Don't bullshit me Catra."

"I—who told you that? Because that's not—"

Adora shoved her, using a little more force than she realised, Catra hitting the ground with a loud thud, and a small grunt.

A C.O rushed in, a stern look on their face. "What's going on inmates, is everything okay?"

Adora looked down at Catra, then the guard. They had a no violence tolerance, and although it obviously wasn't always followed, if Catra told them—

"Yeah, we're good, I just tripped, its fine," Catra interjected before Adora could even say anything, brushing herself off. 

He gave the pair a suspicious glare, but accepted the excuse anyway. "Fine. Make sure to get out your cell soon, you two." 

They both nodded, then waited for the guard to leave before resuming their conversation. 

"Adora, sit."

"Catra, _ no._ Tell me why I should listen to you."

Catra groaned. "Tell me who told you all this." 

"Catra, sit." Adora crossed her arms. 

"Fine, because I'm willing to listen, _ unlike you. _"

Catra sat back down, with Adora practically towering over her. 

"Coco. When you were gone, I was eating, and Coco comes up to me and tells me that you're only here to keep Hordak's drug business going on the inside, that you're _ related to him_, _ not an orphan,_ and that you were going to push me into it all somehow, _ then _ drop me in it or get rid of me at the first chance.

"And I didn't want to believe it, but it actually makes sense. Why else would you always be talking to all those people? They're your customers. Your _ dad's _ customers."

Mouth agape, Catra shook her head, letting out a chuckle.

Arms now dangling uselessly at her side, Adora's anger had melted slightly, leaving a puddle of perplexity. 

"What? Why are you...why are you laughing? 

Catra smirked. "Adora, sit."

Adora followed the order. 

"You'll believe just about anything any lowlife tells you, huh? Well, I guess she's not completely wrong, but boy, are these 'sources' getting a _ lot _ worse."

Fixing her eyes on the ground, Adora was mostly speechless, and utterly confused by Catra's reaction to her accusation. "I don't…"

"Adora, I know we've not known each other long, but I promise, I'd never lie to you like _ that,_ because as much as I hate to admit it...I've actually taken a liking to you. Wow...I'm going soft."

Looking up, Adora asked, "But, what _ is _ the truth then?"

Catra sighed, "it's a bit of a long story…"

It was. Turned out, Catra was Hordak's daughter, his _ adoptive _ daughter, she hadn’t lied about being an orphan. And while she had done his dirty work for a period of time, it got to a point where she realised that she didn't want that for her life. 

"I did the only thing I knew how to do. Steal. From his own fucking businesses,” she scoffed. “All to try and make a life for myself, away from him, and all that bullshit. 

“I didn’t even have a chance to bag anything _ that _ good before his cop friends caught me — none of that getting caught on purpose bs. Anyway, I didn't realise it was him, until he gets one of his guys come to visit me in jail. I thought he was gonna bail me out but, instead, they tell me it was him, and that I’m going down for it. The bastard said the only way I was getting out was if I continued his business on the inside."

That's how Catra had ended up isolated from everyone and everything she'd previously known, yet still under Hordak's wrath. However, just like before, in fact, even quicker than before, she grew tired. The only way she thought she could escape from him (or buy herself more time) was transferring. She got into a fight, then another, and another, until they finally moved her to another prison, but in turn extended her sentence. 

"That's how I got here. But, his people are _ still everywhere_."

"Oh, Catra..." Adora placed her hand over Catra's.

"So yeah, those people I'd talk to _ were _ his customers, but not anymore. It's been months since I've actually done the job. 

“And I'm trying really hard to get 'em off my case. A lot of threats. Received and given. I do have people on my side, if anything goes south— though it shouldn’t. But I'm...I'm hoping you can be one of 'em. If it’s needed." 

Catra looked up, eyes wide with hope, and Adora could never say no to that, never shatter that. 

She knew Catra wasn't lying. There was _ trust _ building between them. 

Squeezing her hand, Adora smiled, "of course I can be."

Catra returned her smile with a grin of her own. "Good to know." 

Both realised at the same time that Adora's hand was still clinging to Catra's, and both retreated at the same time too, blushing and shuffling a little apart.

"Oh, and Catra?" Adora cracked through the shell of silence among them.

"Adora?" For a split second, Catra's grin faltered. 

"Just so you know, I've taken a liking to you too." 

Catra's grin was back in full force. 

And just like that, everything reverted back to the way it was. Adora and Catra, back to their routine, back to their banter, back to enjoying the company of the other. 

Adora had missed it more than she realised. 

And she liked to assume Catra did too. 

Although, not everything could go back to being the same. Adora's paranoia couldn't help but ask a million different questions:

Did Catra know where she was really from?

Had she always been apart of a gang? 

And had she ever had to...kill? 

Those questions kept playing over and over in her mind for the rest of the month without fail. 

_ Five months down, seven more months to go. _

#####  **-6-**

Six months in, and Adora and Catra had both realised that despite all their late night conversations, there was a lot they didn't know about each other. 

They were both lying down on their bunks, Catra reading and Adora listening.

For a while, Adora had trouble sleeping, so Catra suggested she read to her, and although she found it stupid at first, Adora couldn't deny that listening to Catra's soothing voice drone on about whatever Charles Dickens was tying to convey in his stories helped. 

So, it was added to their routine, and most days, Catra would read until Adora fell asleep, or, she did, though the latter rarely happened. 

Now, as Adora listened to Catra read, unlike usual, she couldn't zone out and only think of the words Catra was saying, and only Catra's voice. Her brain was itching with thoughts, questions, and she was tired of not having that itch scratched. 

"Catra?" She interrupted.

"Adora?"

"I was just thinking... actually no—don't worry, you can turn of your light and sleep."

"Fine," Catra switched her flashlight off, then said, "but _ no _ to the second part. What's on your mind Adora? I don't really like the idea of a repeat of last month, so spit it out." 

Adora let out a small sigh. "It's just, we've known each other for almost seven months, and maybe I'm the only one who feels like this but, I just feel like we don't know enough about each other, about our lives— but I guess maybe I'm being stupid, because after all this is—" 

"Yeah."

"Yeah? Yeah, no? Or yeah, yeah? Catra you're making this kinda unclear." The pitch of Adora's voice went up by what felt like half an octave.

Catra chuckled, "Jesus Adora, I mean, yeah, _ yeah._ Of course I've wondered about your life and shit. And _ you _ clearly have, huh. Soo...why don't we play a game of: truth or truth?"

Adora stared up at her bunk, Catra right above her. She almost wished she was next to her, close enough to make this feel more...intimate? But, she supposed that the fact they were cell mates talking this late into the night was already more intimate than what most people experienced with theirs. 

Adora grinned, despite the fact they were surrounded by darkness. "Sure. Do you wanna go first?"

"Okay...I told you the full story of how I got here, so what about you? You said you got caught with a ton of drugs. How?"

"Wow," Adora let out a small chuckle, "always straight into the deep end with you?" 

"You know it baby." 

There was a beat of silence. Of thinking, contemplating whether or not she should tell Catra the whole story. But there was something about Catra that she trusted, that was comfortable, familiar. 

It wasn’t like Catra wouldn't understand.

"My family was never involved in gangs or anything. Not any that I know of. Though, I've always lived in a fairly rough area, not very far from your city. And my great aunt, she gets ill a lot, so I'd work. Highschool gave me no real time to though, and no one was really hiring. But I had to do something, and I had, um, friends, who started to get mixed up in drugs and stuff, so I—"

"You joined a gang?" Catra's voice was soft. Full of empathy. After all, that was how her whole life turned out, unwillingly.

Adora shook her head, despite the fact Catra couldn't see her. "No, no, I was just kinda affiliated with them. My friend was in the gang though, and because of that I ended up becoming their delivery girl, they gave me a share of the money, and for a while, it just...worked. I never did _ anything _ but drive for them. They were never actually _ my _drugs. 

"But I guess someone who knew about it tipped the police off, because one day, my car got searched. And my friend, well, they already had a bad record, so in the heat of the moment, I took the fall for them. And they let me."

"Wow," Catra breathed. "You suck."

"I know. It was my fault too though."

"Nah, actually, _ they _ suck." Catra said, disregarding the latter half of Adora's statement.

"I guess."

Catra scoffed, "Adora, you can't let people walk over you like that, it's not right."

Adora chuckled, "When did you become so caring?"

Exhaling through her nose, Catra retorted, "It's only because without me you'd be dead meat."

"Not true!" Adora protested.

"I see how all the girls look at you, c'mon Adora, you're like bait on a stick to them." Despite what she said, Catra's voice had an edge of care, concern to it. 

Huffing, Adora admitted defeat, "Okay, maybe you're right, but I _ can _ look after myself." 

"I know." Catra said. "Anyway, your turn to ask me something." 

Already, Adora knew what she was going to ask. The myriad of questions she wanted to ask. But she needed to go one at a time. 

"Have you ever...you know, like had to kill anyone? Because of him?" 

There was a long pause. Then, "I nearly did. I couldn't though. I physically couldn't. Sure I can mash a couple heads in, especially when I was angry, but not actually _take a_ _life..._of someone I barely knew.

"He knew there was no point of pushing me into it. I was 'useless' and 'weak' in his eyes. After that I mostly did drug runs and other stuff."

Although hearing that put some of her worries to rest in the grave they deserved, she couldn't believe Catra had to go through something as horrific as that. "Wow. I'm sorry Catra."

There's a scoff. "Don't be. It's actually quite character building."

"You always see things from the weirdest perspective." 

Almost quieter than a whisper, Catra said, "It's what you have to do when you've had a bad life." Adora had no clue what to say, and once again came the silence, until Catra interrupted it. 

"My turn again…What do you miss most about your home?"

Adora decides to keep it light, "the good food. Hell, even the McDonald's a couple blocks away."

Catra laughed, maybe a little too loudly for how late it was. "You and me both, princess."

Face heating up, Adora stuttered, "Princess?" That was new.

"Yeah, I've spent enough time with you to know you definitely act like one. What? You don't like it?"

"No, yeah? Well I—"

"Because if you don't, too bad, it is now officially the nickname I'm giving you."

Adora dramatically sighed, "Fine, but what about you? You need one too, and I'm not taking no for an answer." 

"But Catra's already a nickname for fucks sake!"

"I don't care, _ Catarina_." Catra could _ hear _ the smug grin in Adora's voice. 

Adora could tell by the groan mixed with a scoff that Catra was definitely cringing at the use of her full name. 

"Fine...as long as I never hear _ that _name again."

"Can't promise that, but sure thing. Anyway, back to your nickname— I'm thinking…sweet cheeks?"

"Um, _ no_." 

Adora giggled, and made a mental note to call Catra that when she was being a little shit. "Okay, okay that one was a joke, but I think you know that there's only one suitable nickname for you—"

"Adora, no—"

"And I didn't get a say in being called _ princess_, so it's only fair that you're—"

"Adora _ don't _ you dare say it," Catra put on her fake intimidating voice, that might of fooled someone else, but certainly not her. 

"—that you're...kitten."

Catra groaned into her pillow. 

"Calm down _ kitten._" 

Another groan, followed by Adora's laugh. 

Once both sounds died down, Adora still realised she had a lot of questions she wanted to ask, and not a lot of patience. 

"Can I ask a couple more things?"

Adora heard Catra flop back onto her back, "sure princess."

She breathed in before speaking, as though she would run out of breath to ask them if she didn't. "Where are you _ really _ from? Like do you know your birth parents? How old were you when Hordak adopted you?"

"I—" Catra's usual overbearing confidence seemed to waver. 

"Sorry, sorry, that's probably a lot all at once. I can go one by one?"

Catra let out a shaky exhale. "No, I heard all the questions."

"Oh." Adora said, unsure of what to say.

"I just, I don't really wannna to talk about it, I'd just— I'd rather not."

"No, I...I understand." Adora tried to hide her disappointment.

"But I want to tell you. To share it with you. Especially since we're both orphans an' all. So maybe...ask me again in a month, okay?" 

Adora was almost glad that Catra couldn't see the big grin on her face as she said that. 

_ Ask me again in a month. _

An affirmation. A promise.

"Okay."

Catra yawned, "it's late, let's get some shut eye...Goodnight, _ princess." _ She put extra emphasis on the nickname, but it was playful, kind. 

Adora replied as quietly as possible.

"Goodnight, kitten."

_ Six months down, six more months to go. _

#####  **-7-**

Seven months in, and it was Catra's birthday. Adora had known for a while it was coming up, but being in prison obviously restricted what you could gift fellow inmates, in fear that anything packaged nicely from the outside must of been a weapon or drugs, and also the lack of money she had didn't help either.

Despite the limitations, Adora still had something for her. She had been making a card for her while Catra showered in the evening. Since Catra hated showers, (and water in general) this job was spread across multiple nights however, and any other free time she had when she wasn't with Catra. 

To add to the surprise, Adora also made sure to buy a couple of Catra's favourite brunch bars, as that was the closest she could get to giving her an actual present. 

Then, the night before Catra's birthday, Adora wrote a half-jokish-slash-half-heartfelt note in the card — once Catra had gone to bed of course, despite the fact she usually fell asleep _ after _ Adora, so, that night was a struggle to say the least. 

When Adora finally went to bed at nearly 1AM, all she could think about was the upcoming day, and Catra, Catra, Catra.

***

Stretching in bed, Catra rubbed her eyes, yawning as she looked around. 

"Adora?" When she got no reply, Catra assumed she went to shower early. 

Catra shrugged to herself, getting down from her bunk. 

_ Pop! _

"Happy 20th Birthday, _ kitten!" _ Adora had a smug, satisfied look on her face, whereas Catra very much looked like a deer in headlights.

"Jesus Adora, I nearly had a heart attack!" Catra tried to sound agitated by Adora's effort, but she couldn't exactly hide the twitch of her lip, threatening to break into a huge grin. 

"Well, at least it would have been a nice way to die," Adora chuckled, stepping forward to give Catra a hug.

Against her natural instinct towards the majority of people, Catra actually embraced Adora back, then said, "where'd you get the party popper though?" 

"I have my connections," she replied, smugness still apparent. As they separated, Adora felt a lot colder than before, wishing the affection would have lasted longer.

"Alright, _ princess_," Catra bit the inside of her cheek, "I'm guessing this isn't the end of all this celebratory shit." 

Adora nodded, "Correct. I'm gonna go shower quickly, but open the letter on top of that box over there," she pointed to it.

"You really went all out, huh?" 

Before leaving the cell to shower, Adora smiled in reply, and Catra smiled back. 

~~

As soon as Adora came back, she barely had time to put her stuff down before Catra trapped her in a tight hug, arms reaching for her neck, pulling the two closer together. 

Stunned, Adora felt as stiff as a statue, robotic like arms hovering around Catra's waist. 

"Thank you..." Catra mumbled into her neck, and that's when Adora finally relaxed in her grip, clinging onto her as if Catra were a ledge and she was grasping for her life. 

"Uh— no problem,” said Adora, mouth tickled by wisps of Catra's hair.

Then, Adora heard something that she’d never heard before. Quiet, quiet sobbing. She felt the tears drip down onto her collarbone, she heard the nearly silent sob and felt the shivering that came with each one. 

Catra was crying.

And that made Adora want to hold her closer, tighter, to never, never let go. 

Finally pulling away after what could of been a millennia, Adora had to ask, "Catra were you…"

Sniffing, Catra said "no," as though Adora hadn't just witnessed it.

Adora decided there was no point in pushing, because Catra knew and Adora knew, and it was just between them, which is how it would stay.

Unspoken, not mentioned. 

"I take it you liked the card?" Adora said, trying to lighten the mood. 

Catra laughed, and the room suddenly felt lighter than what the dim industrial light did for it. 

"Oh, and did you check _ inside _ the box?" 

Catra was grinning again, "no I didn't, actually. What did you get princess? Condoms or something? 'Cause if that's the case you're gonna have to return 'em." 

Rolling her eyes, Adora retorted, "check for yourself kitten."

Groaning at the nickname, (despite Adora having used it consistently for around a month) Catra grabbed the box, sitting on Adora's bed to open it. 

When she did, her mouth formed into an 'o' shape, before she laughed once more and looked up to say, "you got me a shit ton of my favourite bars? Wow Adora, best prison birthday present ever!" 

Adora scratched the back of her neck, "I tried."

Catra's eyes softened, "seriously though, I know I just said it, but thanks, I really appreciate it y'know."

"I know." Adora paused to think. "Oh Catra?"

"Yeah?"

"I forgot one thing…" Adora sat herself down next to Catra, face stoic. 

Admittedly, Catra was confused. "Yeah…?"

Unable to contain her smile, she screamed, "birthday beats!"

Catra squealed as Adora launched herself at her.

The rest of the day went without a hitch, in fact, some of the other inmates were nicer than usual. 

Adora assumed Catra would be tired after today, and insisted Catra rest instead of reading to her as usual. 

"Seriously, it's fine, I'll get to sleep eventually."

She could hear Catra shuffling on her bunk and the rustling of her sheets. 

"Actually," Catra paused, "could I come down and talk to you?" 

Adora's brain stuttered briefly as she realised she hadn't given a response. 

"Hmm? Yeah, sure."

Quickly, yet with a side of grace, Catra leapt down onto the floor, then sat cross legged, opposite Adora. 

"I, um, told you, that we would talk, or that I would tell you about, y'know—"

"Catra, you don't have to, you know that right?" Adora stopped her from continuing.

She shook her head. "I said I would, and so now I am.

Adora did stop her again.

“I've stayed in the same town my whole life, even before I was adopted. My mom, when I was younger, she overdosed on pills. I don't think she wanted to die. But, she did anyway, because of, y'know, bad decisions."

Just like before, all Adora wanted to do was hold her until all her pain was magically disappeared, ceased to exist.

"Catra…" she whispered.

She shook her head once more, and continued. "My dad, he wasn't the best guy, but he wanted to provide for me. He was in a gang. Pretty high up. But not high enough. They killed him, in cold blood. All of it happened in the same year. Mom's death...and him. And I was barely five, Adora.

"I stayed in the orphanage for a couple years. None of the relatives I did know wanted a gang members hopeless daughter. I didn't have many friends. _ Real _ friends. And then, when I'm about ten or eleven, this guy comes, Hordak, and all of a sudden I have a home. But really, it was more of a prison than _ this _ place is." 

"Catra I'm—"

"Don't say you're sorry. It doesn't matter, it's not your fault."

Adora sighed, "I'm saying sorry because I—"

"What about you?" Catra cut in, trying to avoiding Adora's sincerity. 

"What about me?" Adora replied.

"What about _ your _ parents?" Catra tried to catch her eye. 

"Oh." She fiddled with the blanket, looking down instead of into Catra's gold-blue eyes. 

Reassuring her, Catra said, "you don't have to tell me if you aren't comfortable, I can just go back up to my bunk and pretend it never, _ ever _ happened." 

"No, no, I don't mind, it's just, I haven't talked about it in ages to...anyone."

Catra used her hands to shuffle closer, until their knees were touching, as if to say 'I'm here'.

She took a breath in, then out. "I never really knew my dad, or any of my family. My mom had me really young, so...I guess they didn't approve. She wasn't well, but she always kept going, for me, so I’d have food and a roof under my head. But one day when we were in the car, she must have fallen asleep or something, because one minute everything was fine, then the next—"

Catra placed a hand on her knee, eyes understanding, urging her on.

Another breath, this time it was a lot more shaky. "She died. I survived. Simple as that. Like you, I was in an orphanage for a while, then this woman who apparently was my great aunt comes outta nowhere, and for a while everything is a little better. Until she got ill. Then, even after she recovered, she _ kept _ getting ill.”

"Have you talked to her at all?"

"A bit. Not much though...she seems so disappointed in me."

Catra nodded, "I know the feeling."

"She's visiting soon though, and being completely honest, I'm kind of nervous." Adora shifted slightly, and noticed how Catra's hand was just barely on her knee anymore, but still brushing against it, touch as light as a ghost, a presence. A comforting one.

"I guess for you…" Adora started, "there isn't really anyone to visit?" 

Adora hoped that hadn't come across insensitively.

"Well actually, there's someone— she's like a sister to me, but she was also apart of Hordak's gang while I was there. I don't know about now though. I called her the other day, for the first time in months."

"That's great Catra!" Adora felt like she was beaming now thanks to that good news. It was a relief to know Catra had someone on the outside who cared. Adora assumed that after everything all her ties would have been severed. 

"Yeah I guess. She's coming next month too."

"GO TO SLEEP!" One of the C.O's shouted from the outside of their cell. 

Trying to suppress their giggles, both of them covered their mouths, while Adora reached to turn off her light. 

Catra climbed up to her bunk again, and Adora instantly missed the warmth of another person on her bunk.

"Night princess," Catra whispered. 

"Happy Birthday kitten," Adora whispered back, loud enough for Catra to hear this time. 

_ Seven months down, five more months to go. _

#####  **-8-**

Eight months in and Adora's great aunt Razz was coming to visit, coincidentally, at the same time as Catra's friend, who she found out was named Scarlett, though Catra called her Scorpia.

Both of them were nervous, some reasons more similar than others, and others _ drastically _ different. 

"What if Hordak's turned her against me?"

"What if Razz grounds me _ forever?_" 

Adora did her best to reassure her on the issues Catra thought she would face, while Catra did the same, with her more... slightly trivial issues in comparison. 

"You'll be fine, _ kitten,_" Adora told Catra, grin and all.

"And so will you, _ princess_," Catra told Adora, smirk and all. 

They gave each other a quick hug – hugs had become a lot more frequent, much to Adora's delight – before both taking a deep breath.

~~

From across the room, Adora could see Catra talking to a freakishly large women (definitely Scorpia) and it seemed like the conversation was going well. However, she couldn't exactly say the same thing about hers. 

"Adora? Are you listening? _ Adora?” _There was a hand waving in front of her face.

"Huh?" Adora had most definitely zoned out. Razz continued nonetheless.

"Dearie, I don't understand, this isn't like you, why would you do this? You're so distracted and you've barely talked to me about all this."

"Don’t you get it?” Adora practically facepalmed herself before groaning. “Because of _ you._ You were ill. You are ill!" 

Razz's face hardened. "Well, what good can you do now that you’re in _ prison?" _

Tapping her fingers on the table, Adora shrugged. 

"You need to think more about the consequences of your actions. And you need to stop being so _ impatient_."

"Fine, fine," Adora mumbled, paying the least attention possible, eyes focused on Catra, laughing, smiling, while she was stuck with an annoyed Razz.

"You're an adult Adora, and you aren't acting like one." She had gotten Adora’s attention again. "When you get out, I think it would be best—"

"Razz, no, please—"

"If you found your own apartment, got your own job, and saved up some more money for college, seeing as most of your funds have been _ wasted_." 

Adora's throat was burning, tight from the strain of burying her anger, tears, and outburst on the rise. "So...you're kicking me out?" 

"Of course not dearie, not straight away, but I don't want you stuck at home forever— in fact my friends know some great cheap places—"

"You're kicking me out because I was trying to make _ you _ some fucking money?" A tear rolled down her cheek.

Clearly, she hadn’t buried them deep enough.

"Adora, don't make a scene. Anyway, I also expect you to stay away from those _ friends _ of yours once you get out—“

"But you're ill! You're ill and still want me gone?" Adora’s voice was rising. 

"Dearie, it's not that–" 

Abruptly, Adora stood up, and stormed out of the visitation room, past Razz, past Catra, and back to their cell.

Catra's eyes followed after her, stuck on her until she was nowhere to be seen, then resumed her conversation with Scorpia. 

***

After that shitshow of a conversation with Razz, Adora wasn’t exactly in the mood to talk to anyone. 

Adora wasn’t exactly in the mood to talk to anyone, but Catra wasn’t exactly in the mood to be ignored. They clashed like this quite often.

When Catra got back to their cell, Adora was a state. Her usually neat ponytail was no longer there, instead, her hair was down (which was a rare occurrence), her eyes were red and puffy, as if she’d been crying, trying to rub the tears away, and she sat at the tail end of her bed, legs brought up to her chest, sniffling.

“Adora…” Catra was saying her name more to herself than anything.

As Catra sat down next to Adora, she was initially ignored, Adora choosing to look in every other spot in the room, except where Catra was, next to her. 

Adora didn’t know why she couldn’t face Catra, after all, she had literally sobbed in her arms, so why wasn’t Adora able to do the same?

Catra sighed. “Adora, you know how stubborn I can be, so you’re gonna have to talk to me about it eventually.”

She was met with silence.

“Okay,” Catra smiled, “let’s start with me then princess…” she paused, cautious as if she was scared whatever she’d say would upset Adora even more.

“It was nice seeing a familiar face again. Scorpia was really happy to see me, even though I was a bit of a dick to her before I left. She understands though, and I’ve apologised, surprisingly. We talked about a lot of good things...she talked about how she left Hordak, with a couple other friends, that she was much happier. I talked about what it’s like in here, and...you— yeah, I talked about you actually — don’t worry, _ mostly _ good things though.”

Adora sniffed, still looking forward instead of at Catra.

“But, we had to talk about the bad things too. She told me how although Hordak’s done with me, if he were to see me...it wouldn’t be good. For me. So, I can’t ever go back there again. 

“I’ve lived there all my life, that’s all I’ve _ ever _ known, and now he’s taken that—” Catra hadn’t noticed the tears rolling down her cheeks, not until her voice had cracked, not until Adora had looked up at her, not until she felt a thumb rubbing her clenched knuckles, comforting her, soothing her.

“Hey, Hey, Catra, _ kitten_, it’s fine— you’re gonna be fine.” Adora had put an arm around her, pulling her closer to her side.

Catra started babbling through whimpers and her tears, “It’s just, I don’t know— Adora, no, no, Adora I’m meant to be—”

“Shhh, shhh, it’s okay, I’m here for you, and you’re here for me, okay?” Adora pulled her even closer then, Catra’s head resting on her chest. 

For a while, Adora wasn't sure how long, they stayed like that. Even after Catra had stopped crying, Adora wanted to hold onto her for as long as she possibly could. 

However, (too soon in Adora’s mind) Catra wiggled her way out Adora’s loosening grip, sitting up again.

“I saw you leave before me in the visitors room...how did it go?” She asked.

Now it was Adora’s turn to cry again. Shaking her head, lip trembling, and hands clasped together, Adora stammered out, “she...she wants me gone Catra, sh-she doesn’t even want me in the same house as her, and she’s never gonna trust me again. I’ve...I’ve messed everything up.”

“No, no, princess, you just made a mistake,” Catra gently pried Adora’s hands opened, and slipped her fingers between Adora’s, almost absentmindedly, but Adora was so, so glad. She needed Catra more than anything in that moment.

Realising what she had done, Catra muttered something and asked, “is this...okay?” 

That made Adora smile a little as she said, “it’s perfectly fine.”

Catra continued with what she was saying. “You made a mistake, but mistakes can be remedied. That’s probably what your Aunt wants you to do, because she _ cares_. It might be hard, or even seem impossible, but…but I’ve known you long enough to know you’ll fix it, because—” she hesitated, “because, you’re amazing.” Catra brought their entwined hand up, wiping the remaining tears on Adora’s face with her thumb.

Her face felt like it was a million miles away, but now Adora could feel herself leaning in; falling into Catra’s golden-blue eyes; into her freckled face; feeling their breaths come closer, nearer, becoming one. Now all she had to do was close her eyes and—

“CANTEEN'S OPEN!” The CO had shouted from outside their cell, prompting them to immediately separate and get up, as if it had never happened — or never nearly happened. 

Adora had never felt colder. 

_ Eight months down...four more months to go. _

#####  **-9-**

Nine months in, and it was the merry month of Christmas. Although, the majority of people in prison weren’t feeling very merry about it. Who would be when this was a time that was better spent with family, rather than fellow criminals.

The weeks leading up to Christmas, everyone seemed a little more irritable, or at the very least a little sad.

Adora belonged to the latter half. 

“This will be the first Christmas in years which I’ve had to spend without Razz, without my best friends, a-and there would be this party we would throw—I don’t know if I’ll be able to do it Catra.” Adora had said one night when they should of been sleeping. 

Catra dropped down onto the floor, squeezed next to Adora on her bunk, then, grabbing her hand, thumb running over her knuckles, she said, “hey, I know it’s not easy Adora, but I’ve got your back, and I’m gonna try to make this Christmas as good as it possibly can be. Okay?”

Adora gripped Catra’s hand even tighter, “Okay.”

***

Adora was lucky that the staff here actually wanted the prisoners to have a good time during the Christmas holiday, otherwise it would have well and truly been the most miserable month on the calendar. 

Around a week or so before Christmas day, decorations had started to be put up around the prison, and inmates could even request for some to decorate their own cells. She had let Catra be the one to request for them, as she seemed to have a lot more ideas than Adora.

“C’mon Barb! I’m practically begging you here!” Adora had heard Catra say to one of the staff after her shower.

“Hmm...I’ll see what I can do, alright?” The C.O said before walking off. 

Catra smiled, then turned to see Adora listening in curiously.

“What was that about?” Adora asked.

“Oh, that? Just to do with decorations and how _ apparently _ real light are unsafe,” Catra scoffed, looking over her shoulder to see Barb talking to another inmate.

Adora chuckled, “Catra, we wouldn't have anywhere to plug them in and _ of course _ they’re a safety hazard, imagine what someone like Entrapta could do with those.”

“Probably break out without meaning to?” Catra grinned.

“What, just like she _ accidentally _ hacked a major corporations website and _ borrowed _ some money?” 

That comment had made Catra cry with laughter.

~~

Later that day outside, Adora was running a couple laps on the track whilst Catra was talking to Entrapta on a bench nearby, when she saw Coco approach her.

Adora didn’t want to rush in if there was nothing going on, not to mention the fact that there were several guards around, so she tried to continue running, ignoring her gut instinct to _ go go go. _

Once she looked up again, Adora could no longer see Catra, a crowd in the place of where she should of been. 

Biting her cheek, Adora shook her head, hastily making her way towards the crowd.

“_ Fucking snake,” _ Coco spat, kicking whoever it was on the ground, _ hard. _

Adora wished that it wasn’t Catra, and for a split second, it wasn’t, but then someone said:

“Think you can get away with shit because you’re _ Hordak’s _ daughter? Well you can’t.” Another impact. She flinched. Then Adora heard a groan, she heard _ her _groan, and just hearing Catra’s pain made her fist clench and heart pound from adrenaline.

Pushing through everyone, and shoving harder when some weren’t being as compliant, Adora quickly made her way into the middle of the mess — a bloody, aching, heaving Catra on the floor, and Coco and her lowlife buddies towering over her. 

So many thoughts ran through Adora’s head in those excruciating long few seconds. Why weren’t the guards doing anything? Why wasn’t anyone else? But most importantly, she was thinking of Catra. 

Help Catra, Save Catra, Win for Catra_ — Help Catra. _

Animalistic instincts kicking in, Adora launched herself at Coco, landing a punch on her stomach, leaving her winded, before swiftly moving to land a punch on the other inmate who had hit Catra, square in the face, like she deserved.

Everyone seemed to be taken aback at that, shocked at her strength and boldness, shocked that she was challenging Coco of all people. 

Icy blue eyes fiery with rage, Adora said, “Anyone else wants to try?”

No one spoke up.

Coco, who was now on the floor, spat onto the ground, then started. “Adora, are you _ really _ defending this—“

“Shut the fuck up Coco. Don’t make me hit you again.”

She did as she was told. 

“Good.” Adora helped Catra up, as gently as possible. “Merry fucking Christmas,” she mumbled as her and Catra walked back to their cell, Adora’s arm wrapped around her waist, and Catra’s around her shoulder. 

When they made it to their cell, Adora laid her down on her bed, whispering to herself as if was a mantra, over and over, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.”

She didn’t expect a response, after all the pain Catra was in probably made it hard for her to speak. Or she just didn’t want to.

So needless to say, when Catra did speak up, it surprised her. 

“Adora, it’s...I’m—” Catra let out a grunt as she tried to sit up, “...fine.”

“You’re not,” Adora said, getting out some elastic bandages, “and lie back down, please.”

Catra complied begrudgingly, quicker than she usually would when Adora asked her for things, which made her glad. 

Adora left the room briefly, returning with a bag of frozen peas and a cloth. 

"How...how'd you get those?"

Adora shrugged, "working in the kitchen has its perks I suppose.” Handing it to Catra, she said, "here, for the bruise on your face." 

Catra mumbled a thank you under her breath, sighing as she felt the cold peas on the bloody blotch.

Sitting down carefully on the edge of the bed, facing her, Adora couldn’t help but wrap a hand around Catra’s wrist (the wrist she was holding the frozen peas with) and slowly pulled it down, to really assess the damage.

Red with hints of purple coming through, the bruise on Catra’s cheek immediately made Adora’s eyes glisten. 

Grip tightening on Catra’s wrist, Adora voice cracked, “I’m sorry, it’s my fault Catra, I’m so sor—”

Catra placed her free hand on Adora’s knee. “It’s not your fault. It’s theirs. It’s the guards’— Hell, it’s mine for thinking I’d be fine, for being such a loudmouth.”

“But—”

“Listen Adora, because I’m only gonna say it once: you are the _ last _ person I blame for this, and you know I don’t just say shit to make you feel better. I mean it.”

Adora stopped clutching Catra’s wrist, and Catra’s hand slipped off her knee. Bringing the frozen vegetables back up to Catra’s bruise, Adora’s voice was quiet, nearly indecipherable as she said, “Okay”.

She got back up again, grabbing the bandages before coming to sit down.

“Oh, and Adora?” Catra’s voice wasn’t as confident as normal. “Thank you, for, uh, saving me out there, and not just, y'know, leaving...it means a lot.”

“I’d never leave you,” Adora said softly, face reddening as she realised the weight those words held, adding on in a panic,“—like that! I’d never leave you like that, you know...beaten up?”

Catra just smirked, replying with, “Ditto, princess.” 

Adora looked down at the ground, cursing herself internally, before looking back up again, trying to be serious.

“Where else did they hurt you? I saw— well heard them kick you.” Adora inched a little closer. 

“Once or twice in the stomach, but mostly my legs, thighs— they probably didn’t wanna rupture my spleen or some bullshit.” 

“So your legs hurt more?”

Catra nodded.

Adora hummed, “Okay, well let’s bandage that first, but we need to be quick about it, so I need you to—”

“I thought you’d never ask,” Catra grinned, knowing Adora hadn’t meant it in _ that _ context.

Adora rolled her eyes, but didn't bother to hide the blush painting her cheeks.

***

Christmas Day had finally came, and that morning, everywhere Adora turned seemed to be full of miserable, blank and numb faces. Understandably. Maybe they’d be in the spirit later after some Christmas dinner and hooch.

However, for Catra and her, things had already gotten off to a good start. The two had gifted each other with Christmas cards (unbeknownst to the other, they had both made cards) and some extra food from the canteen which they both decided would be their “midnight snack” that evening for their own private Christmas celebration.

That was when Adora decided that she wanted to try her best to enjoy the day, despite having no friends, or family there. Because, she had Catra — and she was the next best thing.

~~

Just before lunch was due, all inmates were called to the canteen, where they were greeted with dozens of bags piled on top of each other. 

“They got us...gifts?” Adora’s eyes widened in surprise — she knew they didn’t want to make the holiday even more miserable, but she hadn’t expected them to get the inmates _ actual _ gifts _ . _

Catra shrugged beside her, shoulder brushing against shoulder. “I guess so.”

Adora smiled, and that made Catra’s lips tug upwards too. 

“Stay here,” Catra said, “I’ll go get you one,” she left Adora’s side, and although she felt a little colder, she was definitely warmer on the inside.

The gift wasn’t extravagant or anything. The bags contained some toiletries like deodorant (which was very welcomed and something _ some _ needed more than others) as well as a couple chocolates and sweets. 

It certainly wasn’t the best gift Adora had gotten, but it damn felt like it was at the time.

For once, the food was slightly less disgusting than usual, and they had the whole afternoon off. Adora felt like the mood had drastically improved since the morning. 

Evening came, and she found herself drinking hooch and playing cards, cackling along with Catra, Entrapta and Mermista about virtually nothing. 

“I...I _ can’t _ believe you Entrapta,” Catra said through a fit of giggles, clutching onto Adora’s arm as she laughed hysterically too.

“Why not?” Entrapta squinted. 

“Because…you hacked _ all _ your boyfriend's brothers socials and utterly embarrassed him in front of a whole campus, duh.” Mermista said, wiping tears from her eyes and composing herself once more.

“He did kinda deserve it though,” Adora added to the conversation, taking a swig of the bitter drink.

“Adora!” Catra gasped scandalously. 

“What? It’s true!”

“And that’s why it’s funny,” Catra replied, accompanied with a smirk at her.

“Ugh, whatever,” Mermista had quickly lost interest, quirking up before saying, “the pool table’s free, how about we do two verses two?” 

Catra’s brow rose as she walked over to the pool table. “Say...you up for the challenge, Adora?”

“Does that mean I’m going against you, Catra?” Adora followed after her, mirroring Catra’s expression.

“Sure _ princess_,” Catra fired back, a hint of competitiveness in her voice. 

“You’re on _ kitten_,” Adora put her hand out, waiting for Catra to shake it. 

Catra, being Catra, decided to let the tension build, leaving a pause for a long breath, before taking a step forward with a sly smirk on her face, pulling Adora’s hand closer to her body as it clasped her own. All Adora could do was blink quickly in succession as Catra let go, unable to muster a snappy retort. 

Clapping enthusiastically, Catra announced, “Entrapta‘s on my team then!”

Adora nodded. “Okay then, you’re with me Mermista,” which she responded to with a sharp nod.

They all grabbed pool cues, setting up the game. Adora called solids, Catra called stripes.

“You’re so going down y’know,” the game hadn’t even begun and Catra already looked smug with victory.

“We’ll see about that,” Adora retorted. 

The two were so absorbed in their rivalry, that they had almost forgotten their teammates. 

Rolling her eyes, Mermista butted in, “Okay, enough _ UST, _let’s play.”

“UST?” The two questioned in unison.

“Play. Let’s just play.” Mermista didn’t bother to explain, and Entrapta wanted to get going with the game as well.

“Yeah, I’ve been calculating the perfect shot for days now!” Entrapta added.

“Fine,” Catra and Adora said in sync again, glaring at each other.

"There's no way I'm losing Catra," Adora said, getting the last word before starting the game. 

~~

Adora had miserably lost. She hadn’t even come close. It was Catra’s fault, of course. Throughout the entire game, she had been nothing but a distracting pain. 

Taunting Adora, putting Adora off right as she took her shot, poking Adora with her cue, poking Adora with her hands, winking at Adora — _ whispering _ things to her. The thing that had distracted Adora the most however, was the way Catra would look at her when Mermista and Entrapta weren’t watching. Her breathtaking mismatched eyes said a thousand different things, some which could have been lies, others that must of been the truth. Adora made the choice to believe all of it regardless.

The way she looked Adora up and down leaning on her cue, the way she looked back up at Adora’s face, the way she mirrored her position, the way she tilted her head, the way she bit and _ licked _ her lips — it was as if she was a predator ready to eat its prey. It was as if she had been starved for years and was finally getting a piece of what she’d missed. Catra had looked famished. _ For Adora. _

It all could have been lies, but Adora made the choice to believe it wasn’t.

***

It was getting late, all the inmates were in their own cells now, a large majority most definitely up talking, drinking, possibly _ worse _ things.

As promised, Catra and Adora were having their own intimate Christmas party, on Adora’s bunk: shoulder to shoulder; sitting cross-legged; listening to music on an overpriced MP3 player which must of been made in the early 2000s; and with a sack of snacks on the floor yet to be eaten.

“I can’t believe they charge like 40 bucks for this thing,” Catra scoffed, a new Justin Bieber song in her ear.

“Well it's a good thing Mermista gave us hers,” Adora replied, then said, “I’m glad we spent some time with her today actually, with her leaving soon and all.”

“I’m glad I spent time with you,” Catra blurted out.

“Huh? Oh, yeah, me too.” Adora could tell Catra had more to say.

Taking the earphone out of her ear, Catra looked Adora in the eyes, face serious. “Thank you, today was really good, despite, um, the circumstances…” 

Adora felt like Catra was holding back something, but nevertheless, a smile snuck onto her lips as Adora smiled too. “I had a really good day too, thanks to you guys,” she bumped their shoulders, but Catra was still oddly silent, biting the inside of her cheek, spaced out, looking into the empty space.

“Catra, is there—"

“Hey Adora,” Catra turned to face Adora, “could you...could you do me a favour?”

Narrowing her eyes somewhat, there was a beat of silence before Adora responded. “Of course, what do you need?”

“Close your eyes,” She said immediately. 

Adora was about to question why until a hand landed on her knee. “You trust me right?”

Face heating up, Adora nodded.

“Then...please,” her voice was raspy, and almost as low whisper, but not quite, making Adora's stomach churn. 

Incapable of speaking, she nodded again, eyes fluttering closed. 

“Actually, could you cover your ears too? I’ll tap you when.” She complied with Catra's request.

Adora’s most used senses were almost completely blocked off, and she had no choice but to focus on her long inhales, and even longer exhales. What could Catra be doing? Her face felt even warmer, her heart rate was uncomfortably fast and her stomach was practically a playground for all the butterflies she had flapping around on her insides. Then, Adora heard a rather loud “shit!” slip out of Catra’s mouth and she was brought back down to earth. 

This was Catra. She trusted her. 

Feeling Catra’s weight on the bunk again, Adora felt a tap on her forehead, and slowly, nervously, filled with trepidation, Adora removed her hands from her ears and opened her eyes. Catra was next to her again, shoulders brushing once more. Adora squinted, looking for anything different about Catra, but, apart from the slightly anxious look on her face— wait…

Why was Catra anxious?

That’s when Adora looked forward and saw...a plant hanging off Catra’s bunk? Adora looked again, to check she wasn’t hallucinating and that’s when she realised—

“Oh,” was all her brain could think of for an appropriate response. She snapped herself out of her shock and tried again however. “A mistletoe?”

Hesitantly, as if she was a child who had admitted to a wrongdoing, (it was anything but) Catra nodded. “Can I…” Catra bit her lip (she was _ never _ this nervous) as she asked, “Can I kiss you?” She inched closer, the space between their faces seeming to lessen with each breath. 

“I was hoping you’d do that…” Adora’s breath fanned over Catra’s face whilst she interlaced their fingers together and her eyes landed on her lips, finally closing the gap that once felt millions of miles away.

As their lips met, all the pent up desire and want Adora had for Catra was released, making it even harder to keep the butterflies from fluttering in her stomach. It started chaste, mouth closed, Catra’s lips rough with an edge of softness, (always an edge of softness) and Adora’s eyes half lidded. Until, Adora placed her free hand on her thigh, then Catra placed her free hand on Adora's neck, and she wanted to implode at even that light contact. Pulling her face impossibly closer, Catra's breath grew heavy and Adora's tongue begged for entrance. As if it were a game, Catra denied her, instead opting to gently bite her bottom lip, causing a contented sigh to rise out of Adora, which made her shudder in response. At last, she had purchased entrance into Catra’s mouth, and took this as an opportunity to explore her mouth. She traced her lips first, then her bottom teeth, running over them with her eyes shut and her mind repeating one thing like a broken record:

Catra, Catra, _ Catra_.

With a smack, they finally pulled apart, both catching their breaths but unable to take their eyes of each other. Having Catra _ that _ close made Adora feel warm all over, so the absence of it made Adora yearn for that warmth even more than usual. However, it wasn’t completely gone, as somehow their hands had remained interlocked, and just that alone made Adora’s face heat up again. 

Catra really _ had _ been famished. And apparently Adora had been too, without having realised.

Adora started babbling, “Wow, so that, that was real–really good, but not in like a, I don’t know, it’s just I—”

Catra cut her off by leaning forward and pressing a kiss against her cheek, then another on her lips. “Calm down princess,” she giggled and Adora felt her heart drum like a stampede of elephants. 

“Yeah...Okay, I’m just— I didn’t expect that.”

Catra raised her eyebrow, “You didn’t?”

“W-well I did, kinda, but I didn’t expect there to be a mistletoe, and for it to be like...like _ that, _” Adora said, stuttering.

Catra grinned as wide as a Cheshire cat. “I guess I’m full of surprises, then.”

“You _ really _ are Catra. How did you even get one in here?”

“Oh, the mistletoe? Barb set me up.” Catra had a smug look on her face.

Adora gave a short laugh, then silence flooded the room. It was just the two of them, hands locked together, a mistletoe by their bed, and an indescribable tension Adora wished she could tear apart after such an _ incredible _ high.

Catra spoke up first, “This may sound a little sad, but, um, this has actually been one of my merriest Christmas’ in a while — thanks to you Adora.”

Rubbing the smooth skin in Catra's hand with her thumb, Adora kissed Catra on the cheek, still painfully aware of her recovering bruise. Then, another peck on the lips, just as Catra had before. “You’re welcome Catra.”

Wishing the comfort and joy she felt could last all night, Adora reluctantly let go of Catra’s hand, biting her cheek then saying, “we should try and get some sleep.”

Catra nodded, pressing one last quick kiss on Adora’s lips, “Merry Christmas princess.”

“Merry Christmas kitten.” 

Catra climbed up to her bunk, and Adora lay back on hers, feeling the most content, warm and fuzzy inside for the first time in awhile. 

In fact, this was the first time Adora had ever felt like that. 

_ Nine months down...three months more to go. _

#####  **-10-**

Ten months in, and Adora was turning nineteen in a few days. She couldn’t help but feel a little glum knowing she wouldn’t be able to celebrate her _ last birthday _as a teenager with friends and family, but it wasn’t going to be completely miserable or hellish. All thanks to a certain someone.

Smiling to herself in the dark while she was meant to be asleep, she couldn’t help but think about the name, the girl, over and over. Catra, and her mischievous smirk; Catra, and her distractingly beautiful blue-gold eyes; Catra, and her warm skin; Catra, and her rough lips yet soft kisses; Catra, and the hungry look Adora had received when they were at the pool table. 

However, that last thought thrust Adora’s mind into a war zone of doubt. Catra _ must _ have looked at other people like that before. Hell, she might even have a girlfriend (more likely a _ boyfriend) _on the outside. Anxiety rushed over Adora as she thought that maybe Catra only wanted her because she was lonely, touch starved, deprived, and that she could be anyone and it wouldn’t matter, and that, and that, and that—

“Adora?” It was as if Catra knew her mind was running rabid.

“Yes?” Adora let out what sounded closer to a squeak than anything.

“What’s wrong?” Catra asked, clambering off her bunk and climbing into Adora’s forcing her to shuffle closer to the wall to make room. 

"Nothing ...why do you think that?" Adora asked, voice higher than usual.

“You’re breathing. It’s more... steady when you’re sleeping, and you’re not, and it’s late, so there’s clearly something up.”

Sometimes Adora forgot how observant Catra could be. 

She sighed, making out her features in the dark, feeling calmer with Catra’s body next to hers, and her eyes shining like rare gems. 

“Can I ask you something?”

“Anything,” Catra’s voice was as faint as a light summer breeze, something Adora wanted more of.

“Do you...have, y’know, anyone else on the outside?” 

“What, like Scorpia? And some of the other horde bunch?” Catra understandably didn’t get the question, she was probably tired out of her mind, like most inmates after a long day. 

“No, I mean like, a…” Adora trailed off as she heard a quiet ‘oh’ leave Catra’s mouth.

“No, no no._ Of course _ I don’t, I would never— it’s okay Adora,” Catra replied, understanding the concern, not making fun of it, _ reassuring _ her.

_ It’s okay Adora. _

Relief flooded her system. 

Though Catra could be lying.

—but, Adora trusted Catra. She trusted the look in her mismatched colored eyes. Adora chose to believe her.

“Okay,” Adora parroted back. 

“We better get some sleep,” Catra pressed a light kiss on Adora’s lips, letting Adora kiss her back, then pulled away, leaving another kiss on her forehead before climbing back into her bunk. 

***

Adora woke up on her birthday to the faint sound of music playing — which obviously confused her, as she definitely wasn’t at home. Groaning, she turned to face something other than the sad looking wall, to see Catra already up, looking down at Adora with a big grin. 

“Catra...why are you playing music? Like what is—” _ Oh. _ “Really Catra? _ Birthday sex?” _

Catra chuckled, finally grabbing the MP3 player and stopping the music. “Yeah, I know right! And to think I thought this thing had no good music.” 

Adora rolled her eyes, getting out of bed and standing opposite Catra. 

Catra took another step forward, hands behind her back, then another, as she got dangerously close (at least that’s how the guards would see it— and Adora, for other reasons) and with a big grin, said, “Happy birthday princess! Here, got you something.” 

She revealed two things: a few packets of Adora's favourite chips and a small postcard that ironically said “missing you” on the front, with a cramped note and small (very well done) drawing of Adora at the back. 

Adora snorted, a sleepy smile on her face. “You’re missing me, huh?” she said as she put her other present to the side, taking a closer look at the card.

“Uhhh, of course!” Catra replied sarcastically. “Anyway, read the note dork.”

“In front of you?” Adora was surprised Catra didn’t want her to wait until she wasn’t present, asleep, or better yet, not read it at all.

Trying a little too hard to be nonchalant, Catra shrugged, saying “Why not?”

That was the only push Adora needed to eagerly soak up all the (she assumed were) nice things Catra had written to her. 

_ Adora, _

_ I'm not into making shit mushy, but I'll make an exception since it's your birthday. I thought prison would be hell. Literal hell. Yeah I've lived in and around the hood for most my life, but youre alone here, which is worse. Only, I don't feel alone. Because of you. So thank you. I'll miss you when youre gone (hence the front of the card) and also — Happy Birthday Princess. _

_ From, Kitten <3 _

_ (P.s this is the only day I'll accept you calling me that.) _

Reading the card had sent Adora through a journey of emotions. She laughed at first, and Catra let out a sigh of relief. Then Adora was pouting, making "aww" sounds as if she was in a sitcom, causing Catra to blush, making her unable to stand with both feet planted to the ground. Near the end of the small note, Adora could feel the tears threatening to spill out, and willed them not to, which thankfully, because of Catra's light hearted end (it was as if she had tailored the note perfectly to Adora's volatile emotions) didn't happen immediately as she let out a choked up chuckle. However, as soon as she looked up to see Catra biting her lip - staring at her, anticipating something, _ anything _from her - those tears came back with avengeance. 

As soon as they did come flooding down Adora's face, she clung to Catra like she was her life line, sobbing into her neck, hands around her waist, and Catra stroking her hair, which hadn't been put into her signature ponytail yet. "Cat–Catra, I–"

"Adora, Adora...it's okay. I'm here."

_ It's okay. I'm here. _

The sobbing quickly turned into quiet whimpers, and the whimpers soon turned into silence as Catra held her. Adora finally pulled away, sniffling. "But you won't be— or I won't be...soon." 

Catra stared at her for a second, not comprehending the statement. It took another second, but when she did, her face fell briefly, before she grinned at Adora, hands on her shoulders. "Well, that's a problem for future Catra and Adora, okay? For now, it's your birthday, it’s _ a Saturday _, and we're gonna try have fun in this dump. Deal?" Hands leaving Adora's shoulder, she put her hand in front of her, offering it up. 

Adora looked down at it, before taking a step closer, then shook Catra's hand, pulling it towards her. They both laughed, foreheads just barely ghosting over each other, and hands still clasped between them. Catra brought her other hand to Adora's face, finger tracing her jaw to her chin, before pulling her in for one short, soft, sweet kiss. 

"It's Okay Adora," she repeated in a whisper, breath tickling Adora's lips. "Also…" she began, bringing a thumb up to Adora's lips.

"Yes?" Adora said, desperate, needy.

"You can't look like a gay mess when Barb comes in for roll call y'know, so we better stop," she said, completely tarnishing the moment, pulling away. Adora groaned, which made Catra laugh. 

"Always gotta spoil the nice moments, huh?" 

"Hey, don't blame me, blame Barb, and the system," Catra pointed out. Despite Adora's groan, she was giggling now.

From that moment, Adora decided she was going to have a great 19th birthday — with Catra. 

***

"Safe to say," Adora started as her and Catra sat shoulder to shoulder, in her bunk as usual, munching on her birthday chips, "that today was pretty awesome."

Catra shifted in her seat slightly. "Really? Even with the _ circumstances?" _

Adora nodded, "even with the circumstances, kitten." 

Catra really had tried to make this a good day for her, and even that made the day seem astronomically better than it probably was. Most of her day was spent with Catra, Entrapta and a couple other inmates, talking, laughing, playing cards, pool — Adora had even gotten some fudge cake, which Catra had asked Entrapta's help to make it, but thinking no one would grass about it, she told Adora it was all her, and Entrapta promptly pointed out that was not the case. Catra's embarrassed, blushing face and corresponding annoyance had left Adora having her own outburst, who was in tears of (she assumed) mostly laughter and joy. Though, one could never be too sure. 

Catra squeezed the hand which she had been holding, which was so routine for them that it had become an almost automatic, familiar habit. "I'm glad."

Turning her head to face her, Adora said in practically a whimper, "Catra, can I be honest about something?" She nodded, and Adora went on. "I'm...scared."

The smile that had been on Catra's face had been exchanged for a slight frown and creased eyebrows. "Of what?"

Closing her eyes, she sighed, "of leaving here. Of having to go back to the real world again. Not just a bubble, y'know? Of everything being the same, the same to all of them, but different. Different to me. Of Razz and how she'll treat me. Hell — she already wants me to move out as soon as possible!"

"Hey, hey, Adora," Catra brought her hand up to her face, "it'll be Okay."

Adora groaned, moving out of Catra's touch and away from her entirely, arms wrapped around her legs. "You _ always _ say that, but how do I know it for sure? My life was a mess before and now it'll just continue falling apart," she didn't try to hide the crack in her voice.

"I say it," Catra closed the space between them once more, on her knees, whole body facing Adora’s, "because it's true. You're... _ amazing _, and if anyone will be able to rebuild their life, it's you. And hey, you'll still have some friends when you get out, right?"

Huffing, Adora begrudgingly agreed. "I guess." Adora put out her hand again, and Catra took it, sitting back down. "I just... it's gonna be weird. And I'm going to have to _ find a job _ to make money for college, and then I'll be starting college later than everyone else, and everyone else will probably going somewhere out of town, or _ state, _and I'll be stuck there, alone!" 

"Woah, woah, calm down, I'm sure you'll be able to get into a good college, even if it isn't Yale or whatever the bullshit top one is." Catra paused, pondering. "Actually... what _ do _ you wanna major in?" 

"Sports science," Adora replied. 

Catra snickered, "of course you do, dumb jock."

Adora gasped, "hey!" But she was laughing too, glad her mind was being taken off everything.

Once the laughter died down, Adora was staring, marvelling at Catra. Her bruise was almost gone now, and even when it had been there — she was still beautiful. 

"What?" Catra's voice was gotten quieter than usual.

Shaking her head, she said, "Nothing, I'm just— thank you."

"Anytime, jock," Catra nudged her on the shoulder with her own. "I should get out of your bed, before a CO sees."

"Wish you could stay," Adora mumbled, rubbing their noses together, like Eskimos yearning for warmth and affection in the north pole. 

Planting a kiss on her nose, Catra held back a smile, "I know." She climbed up to her bunk. 

Catra read a couple pages of Crime and Punishment aloud. Once she thought Adora was asleep, she put the book down, ready to get some much needed rest.

Maybe Catra hadn't known Adora wasn't actually asleep, or maybe she _ had _ known she'd been awake the whole time but hadn't expected her to break the silence—either way, hearing her voice definitely startled Catra from the way she heard her sheets rustle.

"I'll miss you." Adora admitted, voice breathy as if she had been holding in that thought.

"Yeah...I know." 

Adora waited. She wanted to believe Catra knew it wasn't enough. She wanted Catra to say it too. She needed her to.

"I'll_...I'll _ miss you." Catra's reply was croaky, as if the words had been lodged in her throat for a long time. Maybe they had.

"I'll miss you too, kitten," Adora couldn't help but say the words again, she couldn't help but try to blatantly, _ desperately _coerce Catra into repeating those words to her. 

Catra let out a soft chuckle, "I'll miss you too princess."

A few minutes later Adora was asleep, but her mind was still on everything she wished to forget for a couple hours. Everything she wished to forget but Catra.

She would never wish to forget Catra. 

_ Ten months down...two more months to go. _

#####  **-11-**

Eleven months in, and Adora was practically counting the days until she’d be let out, until she’d get to see her friends, until she’d have to see _Razz, _face up to her responsibilities_, _and until she’d have to—

She was going to have to leave Catra. No more waking up to see Catra still fast asleep, or falling asleep to the sweet sweet sound of whatever classic she was reading, which admittedly, Adora could never name in the morning. It was more entertaining to listen to Catra’s voice and how excited she would get, and then listen to her try and downplay her excitement. 

God — The more Adora thought about her, the _ harder _ it was to stop. 

Unfortunately (or possibly the opposite) the harsh water turning even colder in the grimy shower had given her the wake up call she had needed. One thing she was _ definitely _ excited for was a bubble bath. 

Sighing, Adora put on her robe, and returned to her cell, ready for the day ahead of her.

***

Adora was having a bad day. There were no parties, nothing to celebrate, and _ nothing _ to be happy about. As, she supposed, it should always be in prison. This was normal of course, but that didn't help to make her feel any better. During work days, everything seemed slower, even in the kitchen, and Adora desperately wished for things to speed up to a break, to see a Catra, to lunch, to see Catra, to the end of the day, _ to see Catra. _So when it was finally time for her break, Adora couldn’t have gotten out of that kitchen quicker, because on a day like that she was sure Catra’s—

“Watch it blondie!” Coco, who had _ actually _ been the one carelessly running around (despite the rules prohibiting doing so), had the nerve to tell Adora to watch it, after everything. She could already feel her blood boiling.

Adora decided to keep her cool, “Sorry, I guess. I'll be more careful.” She had started walking when Coco called after her. 

“How’s your boss? Or prison wife? Or whatever you call her? Still got that nice bruise on her face? Y’know, I’d love to give her another one.”

Stifling laughter, Adora turned back around again. “You’re really tryna intimidate me Coco, even though _ I’m _ the one who kicked your ass?” She gave a Candid smile, then said, "stay out of my way, and you know I'll stay out of yours."

It was as if Coco hadn't heard a thing she'd said. "Or have you given her other bruises, which were a little...lower?" 

Adora took a step closer, face heating for two distinctly different reasons. "Shut up." 

Coco closed the distance between them even more, mouth on the verge of a snarl, a mere inch or so apart. Adora didn't like it. "Or what, Gonna get your _fuck buddy_ on me? Oh wait, I beat _her_ up, _princess_._" _

As soon as that had slipped out of Coco's mouth, it had felt like venomous spit was slowly making its way into Adora's body, corrupting her better judgement. Fists clenched, Adora has lost all sense of logic, the only thing running through her mind being: _ fuck her up, fuck her up, fuck her– _

Out of nowhere, Catra was suddenly coming between them. Out of breath, pissed, and doing her best not to seem too concerned in front of Coco.

"What _ the fuck _ are you doing?" She had said, dragging Adora away from Coco, outside, leaving her only mildly confused at how quickly the situation had defused. Adora supposed Catra had that kind of affect. And sometimes the opposite.

"Well, I—"

Catra cut her off as soon as she had the chance. "Actually, let me answer for you— the wrong thing. You're supposed to be leaving in a month, if you get into a fight, that _ definitely _won't happen. Not to mention, I don't know how to do half the shit you can do with bandages!" 

Although it wasn't the best time to be smiling, Adora couldn't help herself. Catra cared about those kinds of things? Catra..._ cared _ about those kinds of things. Furthermore, she was also right. 

"Why the fuck are you smiling? It's not funny Adora." Catra sat down on the bench with a huff, like an upset teenager (which she wasn't anymore). 

Adora joined her. "No, it's not. But you being all...it's just— you're cute."

"Shut up," Catra said, biting back a smile and face turning red. She sat up a little more, serious again. "But, I mean it Adora, why would you try to get in another fucking fight with her?"

"It wasn't me!" Adora protested, a little too loudly. She lowered her voice once she continued. "She just came up to me, saying a load of bullshit, about, stuff— what else was I gonna do?"

Catra raised an eyebrow. "What stuff Adora?" 

Adora focused on the gravel beneath her feet as opposed to Catra, silent.

"C'mon princess, our break only lasts so long you know." She bumped their shoulders together, comforting, supportive, urging her to continue.

Adora bit the inside of her cheek. "You. Me. Both of us. I don't really—" 

Nodding slowly, Catra understood what she was trying to say. "I get it Adora, _ I really do. _ But you must realise Coco was tryna rile you up, get you to fight her, on purpose, then you'd both end up in solitary and you're sentence would get moved up further. Revenge Adora, she wanted _ revenge _, to sabotage you leaving."

_ Damn. _

Adora had been so blinded by rage at the time that somehow she hadn't even realised how blatantly obvious Coco's intentions were, especially since she wasn't exactly the subtlest person. 

Now _ she _ felt like an idiot. "Wow...I can't believe I didn't realise, I was _ so careless. _ I was just really…some of the stuff she was saying hit a nerve I guess.” She shrugged, as if it were nothing.

"Yeah, I’m sure, but you’re _ so _ close to getting out of here. Don’t ruin it, okay?” Catra looked at Adora with what felt like genuine concern for her sentence not being extended, and for her not getting hurt. It made her want to squeal like a little girl who had just gotten a pony. 

She nodded, possibly too much, too enthusiastically, or maybe too slowly. Whatever it was, it made Catra snort, then look away, choosing to stare at the ground. 

She stood up. "Work calls."

Helpless, Adora sat there, frozen, as Catra started to walk away. "Catra, wait!" She caught up to her in within a second. 

“What’s up?” Catra could almost always tell when there was something wrong. 

“Nothing, I just wish I could—” had Adora’s mouth always felt this dry? “I-I’ll see you at lunch?”

Her face seemed to fall briefly, “Of course.” Catra’s lips turned upwards again, and with that, they went their separate ways for the next couple hours.

***

“What were you gonna say?” Catra asked, the two in the ever familiar position — sat up against the cold wall, side to side, shoulder to shoulder,with no space between them.

“Huh?” Adora said, perplexed.

The rest of the day had been a drag, the saving grace of it joking around with Catra and Entrapta at lunch and dinner. Once Adora got to her cell, the urge to collapse immediately and fall into a lifelong sleep was tempting — at least before Catra came back from her shower, chatty as ever and somehow still bustling with energy. Usually, Adora was more like that. 

Maybe she was compensating because of Adora’s bad mood. Which seemed to be the topic they were approaching in their conversation.

“At the bench. When I was about to leave? After the _ Coco ordeal, _ which would of been a _ much _ bigger deal if I hadn’t intervened by the way.” Catra said, hoping Adora would understand what she was talking about.

Slowly, Adora turned to face her. “Huh?” She said again, clueless.

“Ughh, you and your dumb jock memory,” Catra complained, running a hand over her face, and Adora gasped, offended.

She continued nonetheless. “When I asked if you were okay. You were _ about _ to say something, then just interrupted it to ask about lunch.”

Adora’s eyes flickered, trying to recall what Catra was describing. “Oh.” She remembered now. “Today was kinda shit, that was all.” Her normally pale face was rosier with each second of silence. Catra definitely noticed. 

Grabbing her jaw, she said, “You said you wished you could do something,” Catra pulled her face closer, “What was it?”

It was astounding how much of an effect Catra had on Adora. As Catra’s breath fanned over her, Adora felt as though any second now she would melt into a puddle, or combust, or kiss Catra senseless — if only she wasn’t frozen to the spot.

Despite Adora’s short circuiting, she managed to compose herself enough to answer the question, mediocrely. “I wanted to say that...that I just wished— I don’t know Catra! I-I was just having a shit day and wanted you to say something, like you always do, and make me laugh, o-or _ kiss me_, but I couldn’t ask for that, could—”

Lips clashing together, lips _ finally _ clashing together, Catra sighed into the kiss, causing shivers to travel down Adora’s spine. It was a kiss that said _ 'you should of just asked dumbass,’ _ a kiss that also said, _ ‘I’d never say no’. _ And she didn’t know why, but that kiss felt different to previous. There was more electricity, _ more sparks. _ They were both power sources adding volts to the current, the current which was only going in _ one direction. _

For the first time, hands started to roam from familiar positions like jaws, or necks, and became more exploratory; grasping, groping, squeezing over their prison sleepwear. As Catra moved into Adora’s lap, the kiss was becoming more fervent, desperate, hungry, hungry for something new. Catra started leaving kisses on Adora’s jaw whilst she grasped the back of her shirt; Adora wanted nothing more than her tongue in her mouth again, but also needed Catra to continue what she was doing; continue showering her with _ that _ kind of affection. Her brain had never felt so conflicted and hazy. Then, Catra pressed her lips against Adora’s neck, and oh— this was new. New, and _ very _ good.

“Keep going,” Adora breathed, not wanting it to stop for even a second. And up until that point they had mostly been silent (spare a few sighs and their normal chatter before things had escalated) but when Catra bit into her neck, Adora couldn’t help but let out a sated groan, Catra's name stuck in her throat. Instantly, the pressure on her neck was gone and her lips were on Catra’s again. 

“Too loud,” she murmured against her.

Adora broke the kiss, lips swollen and breath heavy, ”Sorry, I wish we could—”

“Yeah...I wish we could too, but—” Catra pecked her on the nose. “Think we got a little carried away there.” 

Ignoring the latter half of Catra’s statement, Adora said, “One day, we will.”

Moving off Adora’s lap, (she already desperately missed weight) Catra raised an eyebrow, “One day? What are you suggesting princess?” She had that mischievous grin which Adora couldn’t help but chuckle at.

Once the laughter died down, Adora’s thoughts were once more scattered, and all of a sudden she had a million different things she wanted to say, to ask Catra. 

In the end, she settled on: “Catra, do you…do you think you’ve changed? Since first coming here?”

Catra bit her lip, looking down at her hand fiddling with Adora’s fingers. “Do _ you _think I’ve changed?” 

Adora couldn’t even bother to hide her smile at the extremely typical-of-Catra answer to her question. “Well...I guess you have. When I first got here, you were pretty hesitant to open up, or even speak to me at all on that first week, then, even though we talked, we didn’t _ really _ talk. Then…”

“Then what?” Catra whispered.

“Then I started to trust you, and _ you _ started to trust _ me_.” Adora said those words as if she was truly realising them for the first time. 

All Catra did was nod, as if she hadn’t expected all that, as if she hadn’t realised either. “I think you answered your own question there princess.” 

“I guess I did,” Adora interlaced their fingers, and sighed. “I don’t know what I’m going to do when I get out.”

“What do you mean?” Catra asked, but Adora was sure she knew. 

“When can you get out?” Adora responded, dodging Catra’s question, and this time, she let her.

“I’m supposed to be here for another year. But they said if I’m on my best behaviour...six more months? Why?” Catra eyed her suspiciously.

“And you can’t go back to Hordak?” 

“Nope.” Catra replied.

“So, maybe, you could move to...my town?” Adora asked, trying to sound casual but as expected, coming across extremely nervous.

The tension in the air was eased with Catra’s giggle. “You’re cute princess,” She said, pressing her lips on Adora’s cheek. 

Adora noticed her avoiding the actual question, like she had done just minutes before. But Catra had let it go, so she let it go too. “You’re not too bad either kitten,” she smiled, and the hint of sadness in it didn’t go unnoticed.

Before Catra could begin to remedy anything, they both heard footsteps, which meant it was Catra’s cue to unceremoniously climb back into her bunk, leaving one last lingering kiss on Adora’s lips. 

That night, Adora let her mind wander, ponder. A lot of it was to do with Catra. She thought about the obvious stuff that she was always on her mind, always making her heart soar and brain stutter. But she also thought about all the words (and saliva) they had exchanged. All the words Catra had said kept repeating in her mind on loop. 

_ …you’re so close to getting out of here. Don’t ruin it, okay? _

_ ...I wish we could too. _

_ ...Do _ ** _you_ ** _ think I’ve changed? _

All the words Catra had meant.

Most of all, she worried that maybe Catra would never exist in any world or place except this, and maybe once Adora left, all she’d be was a distant memory. A dream she’d had in the comfort of her own bed, a love letter never sent, a lingering confession never confessed. 

Adora was determined to knock down one final wall before she left. 

_ Eleven months down...one more month to go. _

#####  **-12-**

Twelve months in, and Adora was told by her case manager that she was due to leave at the start of the new week. The Monday. Which meant she had the weekend left, and then she would be gone. 

It was strange. This year should have been the worst year of her life. In some ways it was, it was hardly a nice holiday in Ibiza. She was supposed to come out and say, _ ‘thank fuck I’m outta there,’ _ but Adora knew that she would not be able to say that. All because of some girl, who could be a professional liar for all she knew. 

However, even thinking that made Adora feel like she was betraying Catra. After everything - all the stares, laughs, tears, soft touches, and even softer kisses – Adora knew what she had with Catra was...different.

But did Catra share the same sentiment? She hoped so.

***

"Monday?" Catra said from her bunk, both plunged in the darkness. 

Adora decided on telling Catra as soon as possible. She had wanted to mention it earlier, but thought it'd be better to wait until lights out. 

"Yeah, _ Monday._" Adora sighed.

She didn't know how she was going to say goodbye. 

"Good for you princess." was all Catra said before continuing to read aloud another - _ incredibly interesting _\- classic. 

Odd. Adora had expected more of a reaction. Maybe the cynical part of her was right. Maybe after Monday, Catra would cease to exist in Adora's world and Adora would cease to exist Catra's. 

***

Saturday. It was another day closer to having her freedom back and another day closer to finding out what would become of her and Catra and... whatever was between them. Adora wished she didn't have to find out. That option wasn't possible however. 

Adora went about her routine as usual: she showered in the morning, throwing one of her last pairs of prison clothes in the trash; worked out; made food to eat; hung out with Entrapta and Catra and started gathering her stuff she was going to take and what she'd give away.

Everyone had been mentioning Adora's release throughout the day, and everytime they did, Catra would close up and shift uncomfortably next to her, not saying a word. 

It was frustrating. All Adora had wanted that day was for her to say something, _ anything _ , other than, _ 'good for you’ _ like she had when Adora announced when she was leaving. And all Adora was getting _ absolutely nothing. _Until, that wasn't the case. 

She had gone to the commissary to buy some new shoes and sweats, ready for Monday, and while she was walking back to her cell, as always, she passed Entrapta's. It was second nature to check to see if her other friend was there, but her whole body stopped short and froze when she heard _ her _voice coming out of the room, trying to talk in hushed tones. 

"Entrapta! Can you just take me seriously for a sec?" 

"Okay, okay…sorry," Entrapta said.

"Nah, it's fine...it's just, I'm really, like _ really _ gonna miss her— fuck, I already do!"

Hearing that made Adora's heart soar then and there. But she had to stay composed. And more importantly, hidden. 

"And the thing is...I never get like this, in fact, I've never acted, or felt this way towards a person and it's...it's kinda scary how much I'm dreading to see her leave 'trapta." Catra's voice had gotten so faint it was beginning to get hard for Adora to hear her.

"Hmm, fascinating! Do you think it could be—"

"_Be what?" _Catra interrupted, defensive, as if she knew what was coming next. 

"Be...Love?" 

Adora could only imagine the scandalous look on Catra's face and the utter rejection she was about to (indirectly) face. 

"Love?" Her voice had gone softer again, "Honestly? Yeah, maybe..." Catra sighed, and Adora's eyes widened. 

_ Yeah, maybe?? _

To Adora that was the equivalent to a _ 110% yes _ in that moment. She waited a couple seconds until moving, then swiftly made it to her cell. 

That whole conversation...was everything she'd wanted to hear, and more. Only— she had said it to Entrapta, _ not her. _ Clearly, Adora was right about Catra still having one last wall up. One last thing she was afraid of sharing. Of saying. Of admitting. Adora needed to change that. And somehow, in the little time she had left, she would. 

~~

When the day was finally over, and the lights were finally out, Adora couldn't stop herself from blurting out, "Tomorrow's my last full day".

"Oh. Yeah, it is." Catra's voice seemed smaller than normal, but Adora hardly noticed as she was trying not to scream at the reply. She was giving Catra a _ clear shot. _

"Hopefully tomorrow will be a good day, with the mini party and all, should be a _great_ _last_ day," Adora said, emphasis on the 'last' to get her point across. 

"Yeah, you deserve it princess," she replied, then added quickly, "it's probably gonna be pretty hectic too, so we should get some shut eye, okay?" 

"Okay," Adora repeated, heart still heavy and a burden that wasn't exactly hers not off her chest. 

***

Adora's last full day had gotten off to a great start. Who wouldn't wake up in a good mood when the song _ Celebration _was playing on their tinny MP3 player?

She decided that just for today she'd try to keep Entrapta and Catra's conversation at the back of her mind, at bay. It would certainly be a challenge, but she was determined to try.

~~

Suffice to say, Adora was doing well so far. She focused on making all the food they would soon eat, from burritos and pizzas (all made from scratch) to her infamous carrot cake. This was a happy occasion. A celebratory one. But with Catra keeping at what felt like an arms length distance (compared to their usual closeness) and still much more quiet and hesitant than before, Adora couldn’t help but feel a little down trodden. Were these really the last memories she’d have of Catra?

As the afternoon turned to evening, Adora was in the games room, playing go fish with Catra, Entrapta, and a couple others. After another round of _ -easily- _ winning, and accepting a few passerby’s _ congratulations! _ and _ good luck! _ Catra groaned, which was her _ subtle _ way of telling Adora she was bored. 

“How about…” There was a grin on Catra's face, “...a game of pool? One on one?”

There were some _ 'Ooo' _s and laughs as Catra raised her eyebrow, waiting expectantly for an answer. Adora remembered the last time they played a full game of pool together. She had lost badly. It was all because of Catra’s seduction skills, that worked very well as distraction tactics — otherwise she would have won. 

Though, it _ had _ led to a pretty enjoyable first kiss. With that in mind Adora concluded, even if she did lose again, that it could bring more reward than expected.

~~

It hadn’t. At least, not yet, but Adora was still holding out. Despite the fact that as soon as Catra came back from her shower, instead of unceremoniously placing herself on Adora’s bed with their MP3 player in hand, she had yawned, and clambered to up her own bed, claiming she was tired from the long day. 

Catra was always tired, but Catra _ always _ liked spending time with Adora late into the night, sometimes into the early hours of the morning. Adora bit her lip, looking up at the bunk above her. She had tried - she really had - to give Catra the time (even with the limited amount of it) she needed to come and talk to her, or just mention something, say anything that would hint to how she was really feeling. Adora didn’t want to tell her she had heard, and worse, didn’t leave as soon as she heard her name mentioned in the conversation. But, she had to do something.

“Catra?” She whispered. 

No reply. She knew Catra was awake. 

“I know you’re not asleep.” 

No reply. Once again.

Adora continued regardless. “You’ve been kinda...distant since I, you know, told you about ...monday.” 

The way she spoke, one would think they still had time. Adora _ wanted _ to believe they still had time. They didn’t.

“And I just want you to know that...that you can talk to me, okay?”

_ Okay. _The phrase had become their security blanket. One word that meant many things. 

Adora heard Catra shifting, maybe turning to lie on the other shoulder, away from the wall like she always slept. “Distant? Distant how?”

Trying her best not to sigh, Adora said, “you know how. Usually at this time you’d be down here. With me.”

Catra didn’t care enough to hold back her sigh. “I’m sorry.” She sounded exhausted.

Adora shook her head, hoping that somehow Catra hear it. “You’re not.”

“Adora, I—”

“Tomorrow, Catra. I’m _ leaving _ tomorrow, and you’re _ barely _ speaking to me.” She had tried her best to stay calm, but Adora could tell the hurt she felt was peaking through thanks to the cracks in her voice and the slight shaking at the words ‘leaving’. 

“Tomorrow,” Catra echoed.

“Yeah, _ tomorrow_.” Adora groaned, hopeless and defeated, already seeing the clear path of the conversation. She could practically hear Catra saying something like:

_ Good for you. _

_ I’m happy for you. _

_ That’s great though, right? _

When all she wanted to hear was something closer to:

_ What about us? _

At this point, all Adora was expecting was a half hearted _ 'bye, we'll miss you!' _

Adora certainly didn't expect to see a pair of feet softly hit the ground. Huh? A second later she was making room for Catra in her bed. She could just about make out her face in the dark, her gem-like golden-blue eyes being the easiest thing to see. 

Like a single match lit in a dark cave.

Finding Adora's hand in the dark, she interlaced their fingers, thumb stroking the back of her hand. It must have only been a day or two since they last held hands, but Adora instantly remembered how much she missed it, how much she would miss it, whilst being glad to feel that familiar warmth again.

Catra took a breath in then said, “I know we've been expecting it, that _ you’ve _ been expecting it, but doesn't it feel...feel too soon?"

"Too soon how?" Adora asked.

"Like, I don't know, it feels like, everything just feels...and what if you— it's just _ too soon _ Adora—" she choked back a sob. "It's t-too—"

Adora pulled Catra almost onto her, wrapping her into a tight hug, as she let Catra sob silently into the nape of her neck, hushing and whispering over and over again, _ 'its okay' _. 

"I-I don't want you to leave," she had said between sobs. 

"I have to kitten."

"I know but—but I'll miss you..._ so much_," she whispered into Adora's neck. 

"I'll miss you too," Adora whispered back, kissing the top of head.

“You’re just saying that.” Catra still had her face buried in her neck.

“I’m not. Catra, I…” Adora wasn’t sure of what to say. Of what she _ could _say.

“Can I stay Adora? Just...for a little while longer?” 

“Why would I ever say no?” Smiling, Adora shifted so they were no longer sitting up. They were as close as they could possibly be, as close as they’d be able to get — for the last time. That thought made her heart drop and smile vanish. It was clear they both wanted the same thing, even if neither could admit it to each other. But they needed to. _ Adora needed to. _

“Don’t fall asleep yet please,” Catra said. 

“Never,” Adora murmured, hand stroking her unruly curls, listening to nothing but Catra’s slow and steady breath, blocking out absolutely everything else, even the impending thought of tomorrow being her last day.

The pair stayed like that, awake, in a comfortable yet complicated silence, with so many words left unspoken, and with a clock ticking down to what felt like the end of the world. 

Yet, it didn’t matter. Not in that hour or two of the closest thing one could get to feeling bliss in the one place on earth closest to hell.

Adora fell asleep first. Catra couldn’t help but stay a little while longer. It wasn’t like she’d ever know. 

***

It was finally the day. Adora’s _last day_. 

Waking up, she half expected Catra’s body to still be curled up against her own, though she was left thoroughly disappointed. She supposed Catra did the right thing, because being in the same bed was already a risk, but being dumb enough to get caught? 

Adora started her day with a refreshing, longer than usual shower, before putting on her new sweats, shoes and red sweatshirt, courtesy of commissary. How nice it felt to wear normal clothes again! 

When she got back into her cell, Catra was still in bed, which wasn’t out of the usual. 

“Morning!” she said, hopeful that today things would be better after last night. 

Slowly, Catra sat up, eyes dopey and adorable, as she said back, “morning princess,” with a tight lipped smile on her face.

It only slightly pulled on Adora’s heart strings. 

“Wanna get breakfast quickly before I go around to say bye to everyone?” Adora asked. 

Catra jumped down from her bunk, “Sure.”

Breakfast was mostly fine. Adora was glad she’d never see prison slop anywhere but on tv ever again, even if that. Catra was cracking jokes, Entrapta was being Entrapta, and every once in a while someone would come up to her to bid farewell. When that would happen, Catra’s laugh and smile would falter a bit. Adora wished they would stop just because of that. 

After breakfast, she was going around giving the majority of her books, pens, cups and anything else of value to other inmates while saying goodbye. A lot of it was staying with Catra however. Definitely the MP3 player. 

Once she had done that, she went back to her cell (she supposed it wasn't hers now) where Catra was, earphones plugged in, sitting on Adora’s bunk. Her name could be called any minute. There was one last thing she had to do. 

“Hey,” she said softly, leaning on the door frame. 

Catra took her earphones out, and greeted her with a small nod. 

“Can I sit?” Adora asked. 

Catra scoffed. “It’s your bed, dumbass.”

She walked over to sit next to Catra. “Well...not anymore.” Adora fiddled with her hands in her lap. 

“Oh,” Catra said, as if she’d forgotten. “I guess you’re right. I wonder what chump will take it now.” 

“You should.” 

“Why?” 

Adora shrugged, “much rather you than some other chump.” She looked up from her lap, in search for something that could—

“Appreciated, princess.” Catra held her gaze.

“Can I ask you something?” Adora shuffled a little, just a little closer.

“If you have to.” Catra replied after a pause.

“Did you mean it, when you said you’d miss me that much?”

Catra laughed, just like she had when Adora had confronted her, asking who she really was. Just like all those months ago, she found it unsettling.

“Catra?” She didn’t try to keep the hurt out of her voice.

That’s when she stopped laughing, and once again locked eyes with Adora, face softening. “Adora, I— _ of course I fucking meant it. _It's pretty obvious too, even for you and your oblivious nature.” She bumped their shoulders together but her voice grew less playful.

“I mean...once you're out of here, I’ll be by myself, and you’ll have all your real friends and family again. You won’t— you don’t need me. I was just a...prison _ blip. _ I won’t exist anywhere but in your memories.” Her eyes were starting to glisten.

_ What. _How was it possible that Catra had the exact same anxieties as her?

“Catra—”

“No, admit it Adora, even if I get out in six months, it doesn’t matter, because—” the tears were escaping now. “...I’m going nowhere, and I'm nobody, just a fucking nameless face in a story or some bull—”

“That’s not true.” Adora said, voice stern, almost harsh. “That’s not true at all,” she repeated, softer that time, closing the space between them and wiping away her tears. “I can’t just forget about you. I _ won’t _ forget about you.”

“How…how do I know?”

Adora finally got why Catra laughed when she’d asked those questions. Not because it was stupid, but because the answer seemed so obvious to the other. 

Adora _ finally _ let the floodgates of her feelings out. “I don’t think I’d be able to continue as normal if I couldn’t see you, or at least hear your voice. I don’t want you to just be some nameless person in the obligatory prison stories my friends will ask for. I don’t want it to be like _ ‘yeah I met this girl in prison who was pretty cool so sometimes we kissed’— _ because it wasn’t like that.

“You...you mean something _ real _ to me. We trust each other, care about each other. And it’s in a way that I’ve...I’ve never felt before. So please. Don’t cut me off. Because I’ll be waiting. 6 months, a year, I don’t care. Okay?”

Catra’s eyes were wide with shock, like she hadn’t expected anything more than a simple, ‘because I do’ or a kiss meant to silence all her worries that never really did the trick. Catra had clearly expected everything, everything else but that.

Caressing her face, Adora leant in for a kiss. “Okay?” She repeated. 

With a nod, Catra’s lips tugged upwards. “Okay.” Then she added, “I’ve never felt like...this either.” She brought her hand up to Adora's which was still stroking her cheek, and put them down in her lap.

Six words were all that Catra had said, but it felt like the most monumental words Adora had ever heard. 

Adora kissed her on the cheek. “I’ll call.” Another kiss. “I’ll visit.” Another. “I’ll write.” And another. “I’ll be waiting for you. On the outside. I mean it.”

It was Catra’s go to return the affection, bringing Adora’s hand to her lips, peppering a couple kisses on her knuckles. “You promise?”

That was when Adora heard her name being called on the PA. It was time. She pulled Catra into one last tender kiss on the lips. 

“I promise.” 

She stood up, Catra following suit, as she slung her gym sack over her shoulder. 

“Goodbye kitten,” she said, tear finally falling down.

“Goodbye princess,” Catra said, face brighter than it had been for a while, eyes full of hope.

With one last hug, Adora started walking out of what was no longer her cell, taking one last look back at Catra, before she couldn’t anymore.

After that, everything seemed to happen at lightning speed. One minute she was being driven to a Receiving and Departures Unit, the next she was being asked about a million questions, then she was put in a holding cell to wait for her driver, fairly soon after she was in a car, being driven to the station. Adora watched as the prison got smaller and smaller in the mirror, a place she’d almost considered home— no, she realised that it was _ Catra _ that made it feel like almost-home. 

It was Catra who was home.

_ Twelve months down, and no more months to go...Apart from Catra's. _

#####  **-18-**

She'd made it. She really made it out. It felt so surreal, a pipedream— but it wasn't.

Catra was finally free. 

For the first time in nearly two years she wasn't breathing the used and diseased air she was forced to inhale to survive in that hellhole. 

As she took a deep inhale, it felt like she was finally breathing. 

A car pulled up, and Catra had never been so happy to see something as mundane as a small black taxi in her life. 

"Thank fuck I'm outta there," Catra said as she clambered into the car, throwing her plain gym bag at her feet.

"To the station?" The driver asked, and Catra nodded, mostly because if she opened her mouth to respond, she knew she wouldn't be able to stop speaking about how glad she was to be leaving.

The past six months had been the most excruciatingly long couple months of her life. It felt as though it had dragged on longer than _ highschool. _And highschool was some of the worst years of Catra's life. 

It didn't matter anymore, because the six months had been worth it. Even though it certainly wasn't easy at first…

°°°

As soon as Adora had turned away for the last time, Catra couldn't help but breakdown, sobs wracking her body harder than they ever had before. 

She was happy, because she knew Adora would be able to get her life back on track, because she knew (hoped) Adora wouldn't forget her, that she was important to her, more significant than she had realised; she was sad too, because the person she had grown closest to was ripped away from her, and there was nothing she could do, but wait. And cry. 

So Catra cried, curled up in _ Adora's _ bunk (it would always be Adora's bunk) until Entrapta came looking for her so they could get started on work. 

Needless to say, the first day was hard. The first couple days without Adora were hard. She had grown so used to being around her, having her presence there, that everything felt quieter, lifeless compared to before. 

What got Catra through it was the thought that Adora was pressing play on her life again, and that maybe she'd be able to do the same very soon.

~~

"I can get out in a couple months?" Catra said, voice filled with excitement.

It turned out that very, very soon she'd be able to press play once more. 

"If you play your cards right and are on your _ best _ behaviour — that means no fighting Catarina," her case worker replied. 

"Come on Kyle! You know that was a mistake," Catra crossed her arms, defensive. 

"A couple of _big_ _mistakes_ that got time added to your stay."

Catra huffed. "I'll be good okay? I've learnt from my past."

"I hope so," he stood up promptly, pushing his chair in and turning to leave. As he did, he nearly tripped, which would usually have Catra holding back heaps of giggles, but being so wrapped up in her own thoughts, she didn't even acknowledge it. 

Catra decided that once Adora visited, she'd tell her the good news then. Until then, she would have to be patient. 

°°°

Catra had never been so impatient to get out of that taxi, away from that chatty driver, onto the train, further away from the prison and closer to Adora. 

Closer to finally being with Adora. 

Once they got to the car park and the car had stopped, as quickly as she scrambled into the car, she scrambled out of it, muttering a quick 'thanks', slinging her bag over her shoulder. 

Nevertheless, Catra couldn’t believe she was actually here. Actually outside of the prison facilities. She truly felt like it was a lucky time to be alive. 

Catra made her way to the train station, scanning her ticket and then finding the least populated spot to stand and wait in anticipation. Not in anticipation for a train (though it had been a while since she had gotten on one) but at the prospect, that very soon, she'd have Adora's strong arms wrapped around her, smelling of vanilla and all good things in the world, whispering _ 'I missed you', _ even though they had just talked a couple of days ago. 

That thought alone sent shivers down her spine. Or maybe it was the cold, Catra couldn't tell. 

Nevertheless, to take her mind off _ that _ (if only for a few minutes) Catra decided to put in her earphones and listen to some music on her prison-bought MP3 player. Technically, Adora and her had gotten it for free, and it was the crummiest thing she'd ever seen in her life. But, once it came to give the majority of her stuff away, she couldn't bring herself to part with the thing. All because of the memories it brought back. Listening to all the shitty songs it played hand in hand with Adora, waking Adora with it by playing _ birthday sex _ on her birthday, and doing the same thing on her last full day, playing _ Celebration _. 

It was hard not to smile thinking of all that. Not to get sucked back in and drive down memory lane. However, she was stopped from driving too far down that road, as the train had arrived, whirring past her, carrying a gust of wind before coming to a stop. 

Catra practically jumped on, happy to finally feel some freedom.

°°°

It had been a Saturday night (five days) when Catra decided to give calling Adora a go. Adora had written her number in one of the books she had given Catra, which she had found on the Monday night after Adora left. She hadn't wanted to be a nuisance, and the irrational part of her mind questioned whether or not the number was even real anyway, so she had put it off. Putting it off in Catra's mind, was staring at the number until she had it memorised. 

It had been a late Saturday night, the telephone was empty, she had called Scorpia yesterday, Adora's number was memorised and added to her telephone list. So, Catra said, "fuck it," and reached to dial the number. 

_ One ring, two rings, three....Catra _knew this was hope—

"Catra!" Adora's voice was soft, relieved, and happy all at the same time, and it warmed her heart. Hell, the fact Adora had even picked up in the first place was surprising. 

"Adora, I—”

"Why didn't you call sooner? I've been waiting all week to hear your voice." There was a hint of annoyance in the way she spoke, but it was unmatched to the clear desperation and longing. 

Catra's lips were already quirking up and it hadn't been more than a minute.

"Sorry, I...I guess I didn't wanna be a nuisance or clingy and stuff." She heard Adora laugh from the other line. 

"I think that's closer to my title than yours."

Catra let out a chuckle of her own, however as soon as she did, someone who was clearly waiting to use the phone shot her an impatient look. She turned her back to her, speaking a little lower. 

"Listen, I can't talk for long, so I thought it would be good to decide on specific times when I'm gonna call, and when you can v—" Catra cut herself short. Maybe it was too early to mention visits? 

_ "And _ visits too Catra, don't worry, I haven't forgotten my promise already." Now Catra _ had _ to smile at that. 

They decided on Tuesdays, Thursdays and Saturdays for when Catra would call, and that Adora would visit on Sunday every two weeks, unless something came up. 

The fact Adora had even answered gave Catra faith in humanity, but this? She already had Scorpia who she called twice a week and got visits from every couple weeks. Now she had Adora too. Catra couldn't have asked for more. 

Because no matter how slowly time would pass, Catra had something consistent to look forward to, to take her mind off everything bad, even if it was only a couple it minutes. 

~~

A couple days before Adora was meant to be visiting for the first time and Catra would tell her the good news, as they were saying goodnight Adora said out of the blue:

“Oh, and by the way Catra— I meant what I said to you that one time. About you coming to live here. With me.”

Catra sighed, “I know.” she couldn't help but think Adora was being rash. Though they _ had _ known each other for a while now. And Catra liked to think she knew her pretty well, especially after spending everyday together for nearly a year.

She supposed it felt rash because it was new territory for her. _ Dangerous _ territory even. But Adora was safe, she made Catra feel safe, even in a place like prison. 

“Well...Think about it, okay?” 

“Okay. Night princess.” 

“Night kitten.”

That night Catra went to bed feeling the closest she'd felt to content since Adora was last there. 

°°°

Taking in all her surroundings, Catra felt as if she was seeing colour for the first time. Barely anything in prison had life in it, so seeing the green grass contrasted with the blue sky had become one of the many things Catra decided she had missed. 

That, and some other things too.

Everything blurred together, and rushed past her in a millisecond as she looked out the window, but all she could do, and wanted to do was stare out the window, watching as the scenery changed from green grass to grey ground. 

°°°

Catra waited nervously, fixing her gaze on the grey floor. They had just called yesterday, and nothing seemed...wrong. If she wasn't able to make it, surely she would have mentioned it to her. Unless—

No, her fears were getting the better of her. 

Adora would never lie. Or break her promise. Not intentionally. Or, maybe she would? 

Catra kept on going back and forth in her mind, changing from _ yes, no, yes, no, _ until she looked up and Adora was sitting right in front of her, panting. She had never felt so relieved.

"Adora, I thought you—" 

"Sorry I...missed my train, so I had to, to catch the next one and then I practically raced down here, then they thought I wasn't on the visitation list and— I am so out of breath, wow," Adora said, fanning herself with her hand.

A small giggle escaped Catra's lips as she said, "it's fine Adora, honestly it's quite entertaining seeing you like a hot mess."

Adora raised her eyebrow, "I'm hot huh?" 

"Shut up," Catra smirked, all previous worries vanishing. "So, how have things been?"

"Well…" Adora bit the inside of her cheek. "It was nice seeing all my friends again, Bow, and Glimmer in particular, since we've all been friends since middle school. But everything else has been...subpar. 

"I'm practically under house arrest, Razz doesn't trust me, I can't drive my _ car _ anymore Catra. The only time I'm allowed out is to visit specific friends, look for jobs, and go to the shops for her. Though, I should be moving in with Glimmer and Bow soon, once I find a job I guess. I really want to work at a gym, but I don't know if they'd even want me, criminal record and all, so I'll probably end up working at a convenience store…" Adora huffed, slouching a little.

Catra wished she could lean in a kiss her right then and there. Instead, she decided to nudge Adora's foot with her own, and had taken her hands from across the table. "Hey, listen babe, I'm sure you'll be fine. Like, you're amazing, who wouldn't want you?"

Adora quirked up a little, then she had a sly grin on her face. "First I'm hot, and now you're calling me babe? Wow kitten, you sure know how to flatter a girl."

This time, Catra didn't say 'shut up', she only nudged her once more, smile on her face. 

"How's prison been treating you? Has Coco bothered you again?" Adora asked, thumb running over Catra's knuckles.

"Fine I guess, haven't gotten a new bunkmate yet. It's still gross, and boring a lot of the time. Coco hasn't bothered me yet, so, I guess that's a good thing." Catra paused. She still had to tell Adora the news. She couldn't exactly slip it into conversation, so instead she began with a, "Hey—"

"Catra?"

"Yes?" Catra said, a little deflated from the interjection. 

Adora leant in a little closer to Catra, lowering her voice as she said, "I know it's only been two weeks, but, I really miss you. It's weird not falling asleep to the sound of your voice, or your breathing and I—"

"I have some good news," Catra interrupted, bursting to tell Adora with an obvious grin on her face. 

"What is it?" Adora pulled back a little, to study Catra's expression. 

"Well...in less than six months, as long as I'm on _ my best _behaviour— I'll be out of here!" Catra's smile grew ten times bigger as Adora's eyes widened and she let out a small squeal, squeezing their hands together tighter.

“Catra, that’s amazing news!” She had never seen Adora this happy— she was beaming as bright as the sun, blissfully blinding.

“I know,” Catra replied, smug and biting her lip to contain the bundles of joy she felt.

“I just— I can’t believe it, Catra, you’ll be out of here soon,” Adora had pulled back completely now, and Catra missed the closeness and the hands on hers.

She nodded. “Yeah, crazy right?” 

“Have you…” Adora’s eyes flitted between the table and Catra’s face, “...thought about what you’re gonna do after? Since you can’t go back home?”

Wow. Adora wasn’t subtle. Nor was she to the point. If it were anyone else Catra would have ripped them to shreds because of it. But it wasn’t anyone else. 

It was her. 

Catra let out a breathy chuckle. “Adora you literally brought this up on the phone like a week ago. You don’t have to dance around the topic princess.”

A relieved sigh left Adora’s lips. “Oh, good. I just wasn’t sure, because you didn’t exactly, you know, seem too into it when I mentioned it, but maybe that was just—”

“Adora,” she said softly, foot brushing against hers once more. 

“Yes?” Adora said, sounding almost exasperated.

“Just say it.”

There was a slow nod, Adora’s foot reciprocating the contact, then: “When you get out...come live with me?”

There was no point in Catra trying to bite back her grin. “I’d love to.”

And for the second time that day, Catra had heard Adora squeal from utter delight.

°°°

Not having a phone, Catra didn’t really have an idea of what the time was. She knew how long the journey was - almost exactly an hour - and knew when she was supposed to be there for - 3pm - and when Adora would be there — most definitely earlier than 3pm. However she didn’t know if it had been ten minutes, half an hour, or nearly the whole journey. 

She liked to think she was very good at zoning out. Especially after nearly two years in prison.

Catra decided that by now, she must of been close, and turned her attention back to the window, looking out for familiar blonde hair, in the comfort and security that even if she couldn’t, Adora would find her.

°°°

As soon as their time was up, and Adora had to leave, everything instantly turned bleak again, Catra instantly remembered where she was... prison. 

She tried to be positive, to think about the fact that she didn’t have long left, but five and a half months might as well have been a _ lifetime. _

Those six months would have breezed by if Adora—

No, that wasn’t not fair.

Adora was free, and if she wasn’t, things might be different. For the worse. Catra kept telling herself that, over and over as she sat in Adora’s— damn it, _ her bunk, _ that same day Adora visited. It was a good day. A monumental day. Then Catra remembered she was still in prison.

***

It had been over a month since Adora had left when Catra got a new cell mate. 

“Huntara,” she said her name was. Definitely in a gang. Possibly wasn't anymore though. 

Understandably at first, Catra was weary of her (as she was with all new people and especially new people in _ prison) _ but after a couple of weeks, they had started to warm up to each other, and realised they had more in common than just both being in prison for breaking the law. 

"You like classics? Never thought I'd meet someone in prison who shared that interest," Huntara had said, and had probably wanted to say it for a while, if it wasn't for Catra's coldness. 

"Yeah, it's fun reading something so different to how things are written and seen now." Catra replied, one of her favourite classics _ (Frankenstein) _ in hand. 

"Huh, interesting perspective." 

***

It had been over two months since Adora had left and although prison was still _ prison _, there were still some good moments to be shared with her fellow inmates. 

On most weekends, Entrapta, Huntara and her would make food and play games, laughing and forgetting, if only for a couple hours. Weekends became something Catra looked forward to, especially every second weekend where she would finally get to see Adora after what forever felt like too long. Not to mention Scorpia's visit too. 

It was strange. Getting back to back phone calls and even back to back _ visits _ made her feel...oddly fortunate. Despite the irony of the situation she was in. Despite the fact that this was her fault, yet at the same time it felt—

Usually, Catra would do her best to push her more profound thoughts to the side, occupying her mind with work, or reading, or laughing, but they always found a way to sneak up on her. 

Her second month without Adora hadn't been absolute carnage. If she could just keep this up, if everything could stay perfectly in balance, then it would be, well, perfect. 

***

Nothing, absolutely nothing stayed perfect, especially in prison. 

Deep down, Catra knew that, but she wanted to believe that everything else could stay perfect, so she wouldn't have to fight to be. Alas, the world didn't work that way, and it never would. Not for anyone else, and especially not for her.

Catra's third month without Adora (the halfway point) had practically been everything she was afraid of. 

The balance.

The _ perfect _balance had been destroyed. 

It all started when Adora, for the first time ever, missed a phone call. 

That night, Catra's mind went through possibility to possibility, each one flashing through her mind like an eerie flickering light. 

Worry, fear, frustration – all for Adora.

Worry, fear, frustration – all at herself. 

Sleep was impossible that night.

Of course, regardless of the fact they never talked on Wednesday's, Catra rung up the memorised number, at the time they normally called. She waited, waited, hopeful, hopeless, listened to the ringing. _ One ring, two— _

"Catra?" A rush of relief. "Oh my gosh, I'm so sorry I missed our call yesterday—"

"Are you alright?" Catra croaked out, on the verge of tears for what she could see was no good reason. Adora was _ fine _. 

"I...yeah, I was just, yesterday was really busy, work is really intense, especially since I'm working so much overtime to move in with Glimmer and Bow come summer— and I may raided Razz's wine cupboard. She _ wasn't _ happy." 

She couldn't help but laugh at that, voice low as she said, "nerd." 

At the other end of the line, Adora was laughing too, and Catra could just imagine the smile on her face. 

The smile she was going to see that Sunday. 

"Are…" Adora started, "are you alright though? You sound, really tired Catra, did you sleep well last night?"

"Well, I—" All of the words in Catra's head felt stuck, muddled. How _ pathetic _ was it that she had lost a whole night of sleep over virtually _ nothing? _ It would make her seem like a wreck. 

"Catra," Adora said, clearly not willing to let this go. 

"I was, fine, just a bit worried is all. You've never missed a call before, so I was...scared." she replied, voice slipping to a whisper at the last bit. 

"Oh." Adora seemed shocked. "I'm so sorry kitten. I didn't mean to scare you like that." 

"S'fine," Catra replied, looking towards the ground as if Adora was in front of her, saying all this.

"No, it's not. It's not fair on you, especially when you're already having a hard time." Adora must have realised how tense it was getting, and also how little time they had left, because she cut her incoming monologue short, exchanging it for: "Three more months, huh?" 

"Yeah, three more months," Catra repeated. "Listen, I have to go, but I— sleep well alright?"

As she hung up, Catra had been slightly confused as to why she hadn't been able to say _ 'I miss you'. _

The reason couldn't be clearer however. 

With every phone call, visit, every _ 'goodnight' _, it was clear. Adora knew it and she knew Adora knew it. Yet, lately it had been getting harder and harder to say it. Maybe it had been easier to say it when she was still there. Still there to miss. It was easier to say those intimate things in their little bubble of comfort as they sat in Adora's bunk. Now, they sat on cold metal chairs, on display for prying eyes. The longer she was gone, the more she missed her, the harder it got to say. The only thing keeping her afloat on the seemingly worst days was their promise, their affirmation.

Catra hadn't realised how much she'd relied on those promises. 

~~

"You...you _ can't _ come tomorrow?" The words tasted bitter on her tongue. 

First Adora missed a call, now this? In the same week? 

The scales were tipping, and it was not in her favour.

"I'm sorry Catra. It's work. I really wish I could make it though, I really do." Adora had been apologising profusely even before she had said it. It still did nothing to soften the blow. 

After a shitty two weeks, Adora would always be there, to raise her spirits, to bring back her hope. She was her only reward, her only _ real _ reward, and now, she wouldn't get it? 

She wouldn't get to see Adora. 

"Why can't you just tell them to fuck off for a week? Why didn't they pull you last week when you were free? I don't— it's not fair!" Catra felt like a child throwing a tantrum, but she couldn't help it if she felt frustrated, tired, _ longing _, at everything and all at a certain someone. 

"Catra," Adora's voice was stern. 

"Right. Sorry, I'm— so when can you come then? Next week?" She asked, hopeful, trying to be optimistic. 

"Well actually, I...cant, so it'll have to be two weeks." By the way Adora said it, it was obvious she had preempted Catra's bad reaction. 

"Oh. Okay," was all Catra allowed herself to say. 

That would make it nearly a month. Nearly a month of not seeing Adora. 

"I, um, gotta go, see ya princess," said Catra, rushing to get off the phone, before putting the receiver down, not waiting for a reply, a goodbye, and feeling decidedly less hopeful than usual. 

The next two weeks were a blur for Catra, something she still couldn't recall. It was the grueling, empty cycle of work, eat, sleep. Work, eat, sleep. Work...eat... sleep. 

She didn't call Adora. Not once. 

Maybe it wasn't the best thing to do, or the right thing to do, especially after they hadn't left on a good note. Especially because she hadn't realised that those two weeks had been two weeks of uncertainty, of fear for Adora. Bad shit happened in prison. How could Catra forget that? 

Despite how miserable, how lonely she felt at times, how worried she'd be at night, she convinced herself it was for her own good. She had been too dependent, too reliant. That's what got her to this point in the first place. Adora couldn't be her only crutch. Catra had to remember there were her other inmates, her _ friends, _ there was Scorpia, and that she also had herself. 

Catra _ did _ remember.

Yet she was still miserable, still being stubborn, still frustrated.

And it seemed as if Coco had realised that too.

***

It was a couple of days before Adora was supposed to be visiting, something Catra was both anticipating and dreading. Anticipating seeing Adora's beautiful, beaming face, and dreading it because she most likely _ wouldn't _ see Adora's beaming face. At least not at first.

It was a workday. Catra wasn't in the mood. For anyone, or anything. Of course, that didn't (or maybe it did) register with Coco. 

At breakfast, Coco sat herself down next to Catra, whilst she was still on her own, and honest_ to god _, Catra nearly growled, as she knew nothing good ever came from Coco. 

"Catra, been a while...how you doin'?" She asked it as if they were old friends reconnecting after years of no contact. Unfortunately, Catra saw her every day.

"Better when you weren't here Coco," Catra said, deadpan and uncaring of possible consequences. 

"Well, I just saw you all glum on your own, and wanted to ask: it's about that blondie huh?" Coco leaned in closer and Catra fought the urge to move away (far away) from her. 

"That was more of a statement than a question Coco, and it's none of your business," Catra replied, voice as monotone as before. 

Then, the _ strangest _ thing happened.

"It is, if I want you." Coco said plainly, so much so, Catra had completely missed it at first. 

Her brain stuttered momentarily, before realising, really realising what Coco had just said. 

_ Oh. Oh, no. _

"You're funny Coco," Catra said quickly, eating the last of her breakfast bar before getting up to leave. 

Coco followed suit. "I mean it." She kept up with Catra as she walked towards the trash can, and out of the food hall. 

Catra laughed, "you've basically threatened to kill me before dude."

"And? I just want one quick—"

"Yeahhh, _ no. _ Why would I want to fuck _ you _ Coco? Have you completely lost your mind? Like, do you need to see a shrink or something?" Catra was still facing away from her, angry and even more agitated. She spun around.

"And you know what? Fuck you. Don't act like you know anything that's going on with me and Adora, because you don't. And I'd never ever go near you like _ that _ as long as I live, you ugly fuck." Catra spat, far too impatient to deal with anymore bullshit. 

Coco didn't take lightly to Catra's comments. But she hadn't realised how angry Coco was, she hadn't realised until there was a fist making contact with her face, and a voice saying, "no, fuck you!" 

"What the fuck?!" Catra hissed, mostly at the pain, but also at Coco, who had already ran back to her gang of 'friends'. Clutching her bloody face, Catra stumbled back to her cell. 

"What a pussy," Catra said to herself, face still throbbing when Huntara came into their cell, rushing over when she saw Catra on her bunk in pain. 

"Woah, what happened?" She asked, concerned.

"Coco happened…" when Huntara didn't understand, (she forgot how new she was) Catra elaborated. 

"This bitch who's always hated me, or at least I thought so, asked to _fuck me,_ and I obviously said no for many reasons, most of those reasons being Adora related, but also because she's Coco. Then I said some shit, and now I probably have another bruise on my face, and for _some reason_ a bloody nose.

"I'm just...tired man. Tired of being here, tired of being miserable— you guys must be sick of me. I'm tired of missing Adora too, and ignoring Adora because it's not exactly made things better. At first it really hurt, and I was constantly worried, then I felt almost good, like some self healing shit, and now...now I just miss her."

"Can I sit?" Huntara asked, which took her aback because _ she _ had _ never _ asked with Adora. She supposed that was different. Catra nodded. 

"I get what you're going through. Having someone on the outside is always hard, even when you don't have much time left. And yeah, you're a little shit sometimes," they both chuckled at that, "but you're our friend regardless. Now, we need to get you an ice pack and then— work." 

Catra groaned a little at that, when really, she was pretty touched by every last word (save a few) that Huntara had said to her. 

When Adora's visit finally came around, both of them were practically holding back tears— they had clearly both missed each other; if the longer than allowed hug; peck on the lips; constant foot nudges, and prolonged eye contact were anything to go by. 

It wasn't enough though, not for Catra, who had been miserable the past month mainly because of just how much she missed this girl, and Catra hadn't said it enough before, but decided that from now on, she'd say it again and again— as much as she needed to. 

"I'm sorry that I didn't call. I needed time to think. But I missed you. I missed you so much Adora, you don't know how much I—" 

A nudge. "I missed you too Catra. I really did." 

After a month of utter dismay, Catra learned an important lesson:

It wasn't about the perfect balance, it was about a healthy balance, one that was maintainable. 

***

Catra was nearly there, she knew that now. A couple more stops, a couple more blondes and soon she'd finally be met with that familiar blonde ponytail, and that familiar breathtaking smile. 

She couldn't be any happier. 

°°°

It was Catra's penultimate month. And it felt like every day flew by once she was more positive, happy. 

Her and Adora hadn't really fought since their last huge disagreement. She would call, Adora would visit, she would call Scorpia, and she would visit. 

It wasn't the perfect balance, some days were still lonely, some days Adora would miss a call, but it was a healthy one. 

Soon enough, Catra's last week was upon her, and a couple days before she was due to leave, she called Adora as usual. 

By habit, she always counted the rings. Sometimes (on her lowest days) each ring that would go by would show how little Adora must have cared. That made no sense and Catra was aware of it, but sometimes things really didn't make sense. Especially in prison.

When Adora picked up after only one ring, Catra couldn't help but think how it emphasised her eagerness. Catra told Adora that, but it was okay because she was eager too. 

"Catra!" She said, words slightly slurred— was Adora drunk?

"Adora, hey babe, how are you?" 

"I'm—" she heard someone _ trip, _ "good, yeah I'm good, but I'll be better in a couple days time…"

Catra chuckled, "oh really? Why's that?"

"Because...you!" Adora replied, very out of it. 

"What about me?" Catra decided to still go along with what Adora was saying as if it were a completely normal conversation, and that Adora wasn't drunk, close to absolutely wasted. 

"I can't wait to–to see you, and to live with you and touch you! Oh my gosh...I can touch you," Adora sighed dreamily, and Catra would of been cackling if it wasn't the most adorable thing ever, and...Adora.

"I can't wait for all that too princess," Catra smiled into the receiver, and Adora knew just how happy hearing those things made her. Just how happy Adora made her. 

"And I miss you, but soon I won't, which is great! Because sometimes Glimmer and Bow think you're not real— which is so silly, because you're so real, and I tell them about you all the timee." 

"Good to know they still think I'm a figment of your imagination." Glimmer and Bow seemed like an odd duo, one Catra felt like she'd be thoroughly entertained by once she got out. 

"Well, well _ you're not _ ," a slightly offended Adora said, "you're real. And you. And I really, really like you Catra, _ really _. And you're my...favourite prison story! And I can't wait for everyone to see you. To know you're real— You're really real." 

At a certain point, Adora's sentiment stopped making sense and made all the sense in the world simultaneously, because although she was drunk, she was also right; being isolated from the world could make it feel like nothing outside of prison was real. 

Adora understood that, after all she had been there too.

Nevertheless, Adora was still pretty out of it, so she wouldn't remember much of what Catra would say. 

She decided on the responsible route. "Drink some water and get some sleep princess."

"You too, kitten!" She said, chipper and happily intoxicated. 

"And Adora? I really, really like you too," Catra whispered, sighing at the fact she was finally saying those words out loud, even if it were to a drunk Adora. 

"Yay!!" 

A very, very drunk Adora. 

"Goodnight." 

"Night!"

Catra didn't know how much of that conversation Adora remembered, but she hoped at the very least she remembered Catra's sorry excuse for a confession, because she didn't think she'd be brave enough to do that again— at least when Adora was sober. 

°°°

The train stopped. Catra got up. It all felt so dreamlike. Like it wasn't supposed to be happening. She walked towards the exit, towards where they had arranged to meet. Towards Adora. 

She had gotten to the car park and was scanning it for her blonde ponytail, and a sleek black honda, holding her breath. 

Then, Catra finally saw her, dressed in a black bomber jacket, red hoodie and black jeans, somehow looking as _ beautiful _ as ever in front of her car, looking up, searching for her too. Searching for Catra.

For a moment, Catra only had the ability to stand there uselessly from a distance, tears welling already, and she realised Adora couldn't help but do the same. 

But she was braver than Catra was. 

"Catra!" she called, disturbing the silence of the car park. 

That's when Catra broke out into a run, running to Adora, running for Adora, running into Adora's arms, where Adora grasped her so tight, arms around her neck, and she got that much needed exhale, finally breathing. 

Only this time, she was breathing in Adora.

Both girls sobbed in the car park, in each others arms, so overjoyed and relieved that the hard part was over, that they could move on now. That they could move on together. 

Catra finally broke free from Adora's grip, eyes wet and nose runny. Over prepared as always, Adora pulled out a pack of tissue, which made Catra laugh as she passed her one too. 

"Thought we might need it— well, I knew I would need it, you were just a lucky guess." Adora grinned, then proceeded to blow her nose, as did Catra. 

Stuffing the tissue in her pocket, Catra pulled her close once more, by the jacket, voice faint as she said, "Missed you." 

She kissed the side of her mouth, then Adora kissed her back, properly, for the first time in six months_ . _ "I missed _ that _ too."

Adora smiled, and Catra's heart was beating at the speed of a supercar. 

"Come on," Adora said, ushering her into the car, "you're probably starving." 

***

As Catra lay in Adora's bed, (_ an actual bed! _) hands intertwined with hers, at nearly midnight, talking the way they used to back when they were cellmates, Catra felt so euphoric that she must of been overflowing with it. 

Life couldn't have a perfect balance, but this was a perfect day, that was for sure. 

They went out to eat at a nice little café, and the food tasted flavoursome, delicious, _ extravagant _even— everything prison slop was not. 

Then they went to an arcade, and it got pretty competitive, as it always did with the pair. They competed to see who could win each other something from the claw machine first. Turns out, Catra was terrible at it, and Adora was a born natural. So, she left with a _ kitten _ stuffed animal, which Adora described as _ "very on brand". _

After that, it was finally time for her to see Adora's apartment, and meet the comedy duo which was Glimmer and Bow. Oh— and they were also Adora’s best friends too. 

Despite all Catra's jabs at them, she had been nervous to meet them for the first time, and wanted to leave a good impression. She was just glad she didn't have to see Razz on her first day as well.

They were nice, too nice, like Adora had said they would be. Well, Bow was— Glimmer was a little more skeptical, which she could appreciate, being a skeptic of everyone, even of Adora when they first met. 

Strange. To think that was over a year ago. Catra's life pre-Adora was much more of a blur now. 

The four of them watched Lilo and Stitch together (Bow's request), with both couples snuggled up against each other, Catra more hesitant to do so, just because she wasn't used to all the affection, or, all the affection around other people. 

But it was just Adora, and her friends, who didn't care, past,_ "awww that's so cute!" _ So when Adora put an arm around her, Catra decided there was no harm in placing her hand in Adora's lap, under the blanket, to reciprocate her gesture. After that, she could tell Adora's mind was _ not _ completely focused on the movie. 

As soon as the pair were alone in Adora's room, they indulged a little, making up for months of missed kisses, Catra climbing onto her lap like she had done back in their cell, but this time there were no guards they had to lookout for. 

They ended up laying down, Catra still on top of Adora, just breathing. Breathing in, out, in, out, in time with each other. Observing, studying each other, themselves. Hands roaming, with no purpose but curiosity. 

"What's this?" Catra asked, pointing at a scar on the side of Adora's stomach, when it had hitched up a little. 

"Oh, I think I'd scratched myself on wire getting out of this abandoned place when I was like... fourteen?" 

"You? Doing something illegal? Other than the drugs of course, is, wow, shocking," Catra said with a smirk. 

"Hey! I had my moments okay?" Adora replied, huffing under her. 

"Yeah sure." Catra rolled off her, and Adora turned on her side to face her. 

"Hey," she said.

"Hey," Catra echoed back. 

She scooted a bit closer, wishing for there to be no space, no distance between them. For too long there had always been something stopping them. Not anymore.

"I don't think I've ever smiled so much in one day Catra," Adora whispered, accompanied with another of the aforementioned. 

"Really? Me too. I'm just happy to be here, with you." Catra grasped one of Adora's hands, and brought it up to her lips. "Thank you," one kiss on a knuckle, "for keeping," another kiss, "your promise," one more kiss. 

Adora leant forward and kissed her on the forehead, "no, thank you kitten," she paused, a little hesitant. 

"No ones ever made me feel the way you do."

Catra's heart rate skyrocketed. "I feel the same," she said, and returned Adora's kiss with one of her own. "Adora I— I can't thank you enough. Seriously. You've done so much for me, and I feel like I've done nothing." 

Her brows furrowed, "that's not true." 

"It is. You're better than me."

"I don't think so. I think, it's the other way around." Adora said, dead serious. 

Catra scoffed. "How so?"

"Because only someone extraordinary can go through everything you went through and still turn out this amazing." 

"Well...that sure is some perspective princess," Catra laughed, more at herself then the words Adora had said. 

"Believe me kitten, because I mean every word of it, _ okay?" _

In that moment, Catra trusted she meant it. She nodded. "Okay. _ Okay_." 

Then she kissed her once more, _ really _ kissed her, and soon after, the pair fell asleep in the others arms. 

Catra had never felt safer, so loved, so cared for in her whole life. Wrapped in Adora's warmth, everything felt right. 

Now that Adora's twelve months were done, that Catra was finally out too—

Things were finally starting to click in place. 

* * *

**Author's Note:**

> Hello! I am back from the dead! With an extremely long one shot that I’ve spent way too long on if you ask me. Nevertheless, hope you enjoyed it! It’s crazy that I wrote like half a novel out of this though. If there are any mistakes I apologise, I’ve looked over it multiple times, but sometimes things slip through and I just wanted to get it out for you guys ASAP.
> 
> Also, if you didn’t know what Mermista meant when she said UST, it means unresolved sexual tension. Makes sense now huh? 
> 
> Don’t know if it’s noticeable but I put a lot of research (usually there’s none involved) into getting even smaller things right, so yeah, I’m super proud of myself if I’m honest.
> 
> I start year 11 on Monday, which depending on when this is out is pretty much a day away now. I’m not looking forward to it, but I just want to get my GCSE’s over with so, yeah. It will be nice to see friends and SOME teachers again, but actually having to apply myself after 6 weeks of not doing so? Not fun. 
> 
> I’m also scared for what it’ll do to my social life and MORE IMPORTANTLY writing. I’m already terrible at posting fics regularly so I can’t imagine I’ll do too hot under constant stress and exams that “decide my future”. That being said, I’ll try my best to write smaller fics (which I find difficult for some reason uh why) in my free time (if I have any) and maybe start to seriously plan a multi chapter and start writing that! I also have lots of one shot ideas that I’d love to do, but if you have any suggestions, feel free to message or leave an ask on my tumblr.
> 
> I know a lot of you guys really liked the YouTuber au, and I really liked writing it sooo I’m thinking maybe a sequel, but lemme knowww.
> 
> Fun fact: I went through like three names before deciding on this one! The first being Twelve Months (self explanatory), the second being Prison Puts Perspective, THEN Prison Puts Perspective (between you an I), AND THENNN Solitary Refinement (a pun, yes a pun). Or something like that. Maybe not that order. But yea. Then I just decided to keep it simple, and honestly I like it the most! Tell me what you think though!
> 
> Anyway, hope my fic left some positive impact of your day, comments and kudos are basically oxygen and very much appreciated AND here’s my tumblr: bow-woahh
> 
> AND DONT FORGET I LOVE AND APPRECIATE ALL OF YOU THANKS BYE


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